I Want Them All!

The black lamp flame of Order flickered faintly on Bernard's chest. It brought no light; instead, it made the cave interior seem even murkier, inverting the normal play of light and shadow. Time trickled by slowly. Throughout this time, Karen did not speak. He simply sat there, neither staring deliberately at Bernard nor intentionally looking away, as if none of this had anything to do with him. He was merely waiting for the "firewood" to burn out. Several times Bernard tried to part his lips, only to close them again. In his gaze, a collision of conflicting emotions churned. Those who have died once often do not become more accepting of life and death; rather, they become more terrified of dying—or more precisely, terrified of the end. On this point, Karen had plenty of firsthand authority. He knew Bernard must be suffering tremendously right now. It had nothing to do with what kind of person he had been in life. The psychological weight of death stripped away everything at this moment, leaving his inner core as fragile as a serpent newly hatched from its egg. Beyond that, the flames of Order required the spiritual energy within his body as fuel. It was an agony comparable to searing the soul itself, for the very foundation of Bernard's current existence was the lingering spiritual energy within his corpse. Admittedly, there were individuals of unshakeable faith who could treat life and death with indifference, but Bernard was definitely not one of them. "You are a devil! You are a devil! You are a devil!" Karen remained unmoved. Tears welled in the corners of Bernard's eyes, and snot leaked from his nose. He was not teetering on the edge of collapse; he had already collapsed. This was somewhat faster than Karen had anticipated. Because Bernard had died "peacefully," a substantial amount of residual spiritual energy remained in his body. In other words, he still had a very long time to burn. Someone like Old Saman had been able to remain active for nearly three days, with normal bodily organs remaining functional without serious decay for about a day and a half. Therefore, even with the fire of Order burning upon his chest, Bernard could have lasted for nearly five hours. Although soul and spiritual energy could not be directly equated, under normal circumstances the residual spiritual energy in a person's body was vastly more enduring as fuel than a soul. Yet only five minutes had passed. At this rate, Karen figured Bernard could keep cursing for another fifteen minutes to half an hour. Half an hour at most, and he would be begging piteously for a swift end. Anyone who had never experienced solitary confinement would never understand just how terrifying it truly was, and what Bernard was enduring right now was an ordeal infinitely darker and deeper. From body to mind, from the groundwork laid at the beginning to the developments unfolding now, step by step and bit by bit, Karen had chipped away at his mental defenses. In the end, a schemer who could pass as a formidable figure had been tortured into a wretched mess drenched in tears and snot. Karen had never realized he possessed such a talent. He truly hadn't, because what he had learned and mastered in his past life had been meant to ease the distress and psychological pressure within people's minds; this time, it was an exploration in the exact opposite direction. Well, the results of this exploration were remarkably effective. Bernard cursed for a full twenty minutes, and then his voice began to trail off. He began to feel afraid. In this world, there were many things far more terrifying than death. He was gradually losing his sense of self. His thoughts were in disarray, and he no longer had any concept of who or where he was. Right now, he was like someone cast into a bottomless abyss, falling endlessly without any perception of where he might land. At this moment, Karen turned slightly away, presenting only his profile and refusing to give Bernard even a single glance. For Karen understood clearly that at this moment, even a gaze from him would provide Bernard with warmth and a sense of security. But Karen was stingy. He should have brought a book. Right now, he needed Bernard to see him absorbed in something, to make Bernard realize he didn't care about him in the slightest. Left with no other option, Karen could only take out his cigarette case once more, pull out a cigarette, and light it. He made sure to smoke this cigarette as if thoroughly enjoying it, intoxicated and lost in the pleasure. "Wuu... wuu..." Bernard began to sob out loud. Karen pressed the cigarette tightly between his lips, holding back his laughter. "Wuu... wuu..." Infants were best at using this method to draw the attention of adults. Karen smoked three cigarettes in a row. Every time he stubbed out a butt, Bernard's weeping grew louder. Bernard still held on to hope, yearning for Karen to notice him after discarding the cigarette. Yet Karen methodically lit another every single time. Bernard, your sins are truly heavy. I quit smoking for so long; don't go making me relapse. Karen felt a bit helpless, but he could only remain calm. Finally, the next stage arrived. "Kill me... Kill me... Kill me!" Karen still paid him no heed. "Please, kill me! Kill me, I beg you!" Karen lit another cigarette. Even the heaviest chain-smoker would feel nauseated after smoking like this in succession, yet Karen still had to maintain his pose of deep enjoyment. No helping it; this was how you broke a hawk. Thinking about what Bernard was enduring right now, well, the misery of excess nicotine and tar seemed bearable after all. Originally, Karen could have done this more simply. But now he wanted to test it out. If he kept up this rhythm, he should be able to extract a full confession from Bernard. Karen wanted to know who the faction was that had instructed Bernard to kill Philias and the others. He wanted to know more concrete details, because he had a premonition that at some point in the future, he would cross paths with them. Karen was also examining himself, reflecting on the differences between himself and Philias. This was not the difference between Light and Order, but the difference in their stages of development. He was far more cautious than Philias. Even the Captain, while knowing Karen's secrets, had no idea of Karen's innermost thoughts regarding gods and faith. Philias was different; Philias had truly been preaching and proselytizing. Had Bernard not betrayed them, and had the orthodox churches not noticed Dark Moon Island back then, it was very likely that the Church of Light would have taken root on Dark Moon Island—a Church of Light that believed only in Light but not in gods. A reformed Church of Light. It seemed that once he returned, he would need to rein Alfred in. He couldn't let him go on happily preaching, or it would easily attract the attention of that organization. Then again, Karen didn't have fertile soil for unbridled proselytizing either. The situation Philias faced was that the Church of Light had collapsed and scattered; there was no hierarchical church structure hanging over his head, and he himself was more like the leader of a remnant faction of Light. Karen's situation was different. If he brought things out into the open, the Church of Order wouldn't even need that organization to intervene—Order would crush him with thunderous force on its own. "Please kill me... Father... Father... kill me... kill me... Please, Father..." Release. He needed release. That was his sole obsession and craving right now, countless times stronger than any drug addiction. Dignity, vision, identity—all of it became meaningless once self-awareness was lost. Human thought rapidly regressed, leaving primal instinct in command of consciousness. Karen felt that if it were Purr in this situation, she could probably endure it. If burned for several hours, she would keep cursing for several hours straight; after all, she had lived as a cat for a hundred years. Another way of saying she hadn't changed her true nature was that she had long grown accustomed to solitude. Bernard and Purr belonged to the same era, but Bernard had been asleep for the duration. Lacking a hundred years of tempering, he was no ancient monster. In short, Bernard was far weaker than Karen had imagined. It was about enough. If this dragged on any longer, Bernard would enter the next stage and lose his mind completely, which was not what Karen wanted. Finally, Karen turned back around and looked at Bernard. "Please, kill me! Kill me!" Seeing Karen turn his gaze toward him, Bernard laughed while weeping. "I awakened Count Rekar of Allen Manor." "Please, kill me!" "I awakened a senior artisan priest from the Church of Pamires. His name was Saman." "Kill me!" "Right now, they are sealed in coffins, waiting for me to awaken them again in the future, because in this manner, I can grant them eternal existence. I prepared twelve such coffins. Two have been used; ten remain." "Please... I want it! I want it! I want it!" Karen looked at Bernard and smiled faintly. "Sorry, you don't deserve it." "Please give it to me, Master! Please give me a coffin, Master, Master!" "You do not qualify." "I know, I am lowly, I am a beast, I am vile, I..." Karen stood up and stretched lazily. Bernard immediately cried out, "Those people call themselves the Silencers! They are an organization handed down across many epochs! Their existence spans longer than many of the orthodox churches!" "I don't believe you." "It's true! They truly exist! I didn't believe it at first either, but of the two people who came to see me, one was a priest of Light, and the other was... was a priest of Eternity! I could sense their power—it was not something I could contend with. That terrifying pressure made me feel like an ant before them! One of Light, one of Eternity! Leaving Light aside, a powerful priest of Eternity appeared before me! The Church of Eternity—that is a church that went extinct two epochs ago!" "If they were so powerful, why did they need you to act?" "Because they have constraints! They cannot truly act! They said they are waiting for the return of the gods, and when that time comes, they will receive the gods' blessings!" Leaving the return of the God of Light aside, would the God of Eternity return as well? What was the purpose of such an organization's existence? To keep watch and guard the house? Karen knew Bernard certainly wasn't familiar with this organization; he only knew peripheral information. "They promised me that when the gods return, I will partake in their grace! As the Dark Moon patriarch, I would lead the Dark Moon into the new Church of Light, become an Elder of the new Church of Light, and be received into the god's embrace!" "How were you swayed by this?" Knowing Bernard's character, if the other party told him they could not personally intervene, would Bernard really bow his head and submit so willingly? "Because... because I saw the God of Light!" Karen's eyes narrowed. "The god... smiled at me." That sounded rather abstract. "I truly saw Him! I don't know how to put it into words, but I truly saw Him! I received affirmation from the God of Light! When the light dims, it becomes the dark moon—my future path instantly became clear!" Hypnosis? An illusion? It shouldn't be. Bernard was not so easily deceived. What was it he had actually seen, then? Karen did not believe it was the God of Light, but how had the other party managed to instantly convince someone of Bernard's caliber? Karen couldn't help thinking of himself. If he were to play the role of the God of Order descending, the difficulty would seem far lower. Therefore, whatever deceived Bernard had to contain at least some element of authenticity. Moreover, the organization actually had priests of Light and Eternity, and Bernard described them as "powerful," which spoke to the organization's secrecy and transcendental nature. Karen felt a headache coming on. He didn't really want to think about these matters right now; in fact, he was reluctant to cross paths with this organization. Its known purpose seemed to be eliminating people like him and Philias. The Silencers... Did they remain silent before divine authority? And whoever dared speak out, they erased? Did the orthodox churches know about this organization? It was probably top secret. Would he be able to find any record of it once he returned? The Captain certainly didn't know, because Philias only knew that Bernard had betrayed them and assumed it was merely slaughtering the donkey once it was done at the millstone. Then, should he tell the Captain about this? "The God of Light gave me a promise, bidding me go to the altar on Heiji Island on October 10th of year 1735 of the Dark Moon Calendar to receive the god's guidance. The god will fulfill every promise made to me! Because more than a hundred years remained until then, they offered to arrange a slumber for me after the deed was done. But I refused, because at that time Philias happened to have cultivated insects that could induce slumber." Dark Moon Calendar... Karen began converting the date in his mind. In other words, in three years? So, Bernard's waking time had been moved up three years early by Karen. An organization called the Silencers had dispatched two powerful priests, one of Light and one of Eternity, to find Bernard, and had even let Bernard behold the God of Light. Regarding seeing the "God of Light," Karen remained skeptical. He did not believe the God of Light would truly manifest to do such a thing, yet the circumstances and atmosphere at the time had left Bernard thoroughly convinced. No, there was another issue. They had offered Bernard a method of slumber, but because Philias had developed insects with identical efficacy, Bernard had refused. Karen understood, of course, that Bernard undoubtedly trusted Philias's character and knew what a genius Philias was, which was why he had complete faith in the efficacy of the insects Philias had bred. Yet he had refused simply because he already possessed a method. Heh. In any negotiation, if you could take care of what the other party offered to arrange, shouldn't you demand compensation elsewhere instead? Yet why hadn't Bernard mentioned anything about that? In his current state, it should be impossible for him to conceal anything or hold back from Karen. If he still held something back under such conditions—even a minuscule detail—it meant his confession was not absolute. Which was equivalent to... Karen frowned slightly. "Please... Master... Master... I am useful... Keep me... Keeping me means keeping a way to deal with them... In the future... you will have to face them too... Master..." Karen did not speak. Instead, he reached out and waved his hand gently over the flame of Order. The flame flared upward, burning larger than before. "Aaaah!" Bernard let out a bloodcurdling scream, begging Karen between his shrieks. This game of alternating repeatedly between despair and false hope tortured him to his core. Karen stood beside the coffin, watching Bernard, remaining silent from that point on. A full hour passed. Bernard begged for an hour and despaired for an hour. He was like a stalk of sugarcane chewed over and over again, ravished through round after round. When roughly one minute remained, Karen reached out and dampened the flame, stretching that single minute into another hour. "You..." Bernard fell completely into delirium. One moment he cursed Karen, the next he pleaded with him; at times he cried out the names of his father and mother, and at other times he called for Purr. His consciousness was entirely fractured. In the end, Karen grew tired of playing. Bernard lost consciousness. That tiny shred of residual spiritual energy was no longer enough to sustain his thoughts or reactions. He was completely dead. Once the flame of Order went out, it meant the body had been thoroughly scorched dry, equivalent to receiving an extremely thorough purification. Karen put the coffin lid back in place, clapped his hands, and walked out of the cave. Shortly afterward, the teleportation formation outside the cave activated. The cave—no, the entire island—fell silent. Another two hours passed. Dawn was approaching, yet at the cave entrance, Karen's figure reappeared. Karen walked back to the stone coffin and pushed open the lid he had closed earlier. Bernard's corpse still lay quietly inside. Karen raised his hand once more. Black chains emerged beneath his feet and crept onto Bernard's body. "Order—Awaken!" He cast Awaken upon a corpse whose spiritual energy had been utterly drained, but the body gave no reaction. Sigh. Was I overthinking it? However, Karen was in no hurry to retract the chains beneath his feet. His attempt at Awakening continued. For him, the cost of maintaining the Awakening spell was negligible, especially when channeled into an empty shell. Yet patience always had its limits. Just as Karen was finally about to admit he had overthought things and prepare to retract the black chains, he suddenly sensed through the chains that somewhere on Bernard's body, a tear seemed to open up, locked in a tug-of-war against him. Karen immediately surged the power of the black chains, intensifying the struggle. Finally, as if something had breached completely, a surge of spiritual energy spilled out from Bernard's head—more precisely, from his eyes—and began spreading throughout his entire body. Immediately, the Awakening spell took effect. Bernard's body was actually awakened once more! Yet the newly successful Awakening spell quickly died down, and the spiritual energy ignited by Karen sank back into dormancy, because the power of a soul emerged. When this body still possessed a soul, it meant he was not yet dead. With the spiritual energy belonging to a "master," it naturally could not be raised by Awakening. Bernard opened his eyes and looked at Karen, his gaze dark to the extreme. Because he knew that all the hardships and tortures he had just endured had, at this moment, been completely in vain! One had to realize that he had just suffered through hell—no, even hell was not as terrifying as what he had just experienced! He was in despair. This time, he was in utter despair. Karen chuckled twice and exclaimed with sincere admiration: "Heh, Bernard, I truly admire you a little! To think your eyes sealed away your second life. This was the reward they gave you for killing Philias, wasn't it? And it was also the method of slumber they bestowed upon you." Karen leaned forward, studying Bernard's eyes closely, and continued: "Are these... the true Eyes of the Dark Moon? You could clearly have passed these eyes down as an inherited sacred relic for generations of clansmen to safeguard. After all, when the time came, you could have used the soul and spiritual energy sealed inside these eyes to find a new body and resurrect yourself. Oh, you weren't willing to hand them to your descendants because you didn't trust them. And you wanted to preserve your original body, so you used the insects Philias cultivated. Bernard, you really are greedy—and truly selfish." "I curse you! You will meet the same fate as Philias! You and everyone around you will come to a miserable, pathetic end!" "Alright, alright, I will, I will. But before I meet that miserable, pathetic end... Miss Purr is mine. These eyes of yours are also mine. I, Raniedal, want them all."