The look in Karen's eyes brought back a terror nearly identical to what Kevin had experienced all those years ago. When that gaze fell upon you, it seemed capable of trampling your very godhead underfoot, crushing all your pride into dust.
After tumbling across the floor, Purr sprang right back up and leaped onto the edge of the bathtub, closely scrutinizing Karen's condition. Raising her right paw, where a cluster of gentle sparks danced, she prepared to conduct an internal probe of him.
“Get out... Get out... Get out!”
Karen spoke almost through clenched teeth, the blackness in his eyes growing even deeper and more profound than before.
“We can find a way to ease your pain. We can do it, little Karen. Relax, don't be afraid. Kitty is right here with you.”
Karen practically growled, “Kevin, get Purr out of here!”
Kevin, who had been prostrated on the floor foaming at the mouth, shuddered instantly. Scrambling to his feet, he clamped his jaws gently around Purr, bolted out of the bathroom, and whipped his tail around with all his might to slam the door shut.
Then he collapsed right back onto the floor, eyes wide, panting heavily.
“Is there really no way?” Purr asked Kevin.
Kevin shook his canine head.
That was a problem even the God of Order had been unable to resolve back then.
“Not even watching over him?” Purr asked.
“Woof.”
“You mean... he doesn't want to see me as food?”
...
In the bathtub, Karen gripped the rim with white-knuckled fingers. That gnawing hunger, leaving his soul feeling utterly hollow, tortured him mercilessly.
Compared to this, the soreness in his muscles from sparring with the captain last night was hardly worth mentioning.
“Ah... ah... ah...”
Gasp after ragged gasp tore from Karen's throat. The blackness in his eyes grew so dense it looked ready to liquefy and drip down his face.
So hungry... so hungry... so hungry...
In his mind, Karen began reliving over and over the marvelous sensation of devouring the three-headed python—Furnites. It was just like a starving person unconsciously fantasizing about sumptuous feasts from the past.
He wanted to taste it again so badly. He wanted that fullness again. He wanted that sheer bliss again.
After cycling through those fantasies, new images actually surfaced in his mind—no longer Furnites, but the people around him: Alfred... Purr... Kevin... Muri...
This was the collapse of reason. The most terrifying part was being able to clearly feel the tidal surge of desire eroding the levee of his mind.
Gritting his teeth, Karen climbed out of the bathtub. Stepping up to the sink, he caught sight of himself in the mirror.
So unfamiliar. So grotesque.
He glanced at the bathroom door, then turned back to the sink. Tossing a towel into the basin, he turned on the hot tap, letting scalding water gush out.
Then, ignoring the temperature, he pressed the blistering towel directly against his face.
“Ah!”
With a jerk of his head, Karen flung the towel aside. Gripping the edges of the sink, he stared blankly back at his reflection.
It seemed that ever since awakening in this world, he had developed a habit of repeatedly wiping his face in front of the bathroom sink, because back then he had not yet grown accustomed to this face, nor to this new identity.
Now, that same sensation had returned.
The reflection before him was just as unfamiliar—so foreign it frightened him.
“Hiss...”
Karen drew in a sharp breath. The hunger from the depths of his soul dragged him back into a haze once more.
Chains of Order spread outward from beneath his feet, first blanketing the tiled floor before creeping up all four bathroom walls. Coiling around him, the chains that normally symbolized majestic Order now resembled ravenous pythons waiting to devour anything in sight.
It was not Karen who was hungry, but Order itself.
One of the chains bound Qianmei and hoisted it before Karen.
Qianmei coiled tight like a mosquito coil, trembling to the depths of its soul as it took in the surroundings.
Especially when Karen fixed his pitch-black gaze upon it, Qianmei could sense that its end was imminent.
All around, the chains of Order were like breathing fiends, practically dripping saliva.
“Wuu... wuu...”
Qianmei let out a wail from its soul. It was no longer pleading, but weeping. A being born of ferocity and malice, it was now thoroughly cowed, reduced to the most primal terror.
“Ah...”
Low growls kept rumbling from Karen's throat as he swallowed saliva.
By now, reason had lost all fertile soil to stand on. If someone else were launching a mental assault, at least there would be an external enemy to fight. But right now, the thing coercing him was his very foundation.
Either abandon it;
or obey it.
Karen shifted his gaze upward again to look at himself in the mirror.
He knew full well that while devouring Furnites last time had been an unavoidable necessity with justifiable cause, if he gave in to desire and swallowed another entity this time, he would step irrevocably into the abyss.
He would lose all courage to resist it. Driven by its urges, he would go on devouring one target after another.
Grandfather had said that the God of Order was very hungry.
If even someone as mighty as the God of Order couldn't withstand its coercion, how could I possibly do it?
If this is something that must be endured, something that must be suffered, what am I even resisting for?
Karen reached toward Qianmei. The chains of Order all around shook violently, as if they couldn't wait any longer.
Yet halfway there, his hand halted.
During my God's Revelation, why did I refuse to obey the God of Order and insist on walking my own path? Because I firmly believe that practice is the sole criterion for testing truth.
During my God's Shepherd, why did I displace the god and place myself upon the altar of my inner faith? Because I do not believe this world holds any savior, deity, or emperor upon whom one can truly rely.
Diss hadn't hesitated to detonate his godhead and fall into slumber just to pave the way for him—what had he done that for? If it were merely for him to follow in the footsteps of the God of Order, Diss could easily have become a Temple Elder to grant his grandson the greatest protection and backing within the church.
If he surrendered now, then when he returned home in the future to awaken Diss, Diss would surely be bitterly disappointed.
Karen took a deep breath and stubbornly lifted his chin.
I said that at the end of faith, there should be no god.
I said he was wrong.
I said I would walk my own path.
The God of Order was indeed powerful, but in my eyes, he is a failure.
Isn't it completely natural for a failure to fail?
Why should the failure of a failure make me deny my own possibility of winning?
“Heh...”
Karen chuckled.
He had said before that what Alfred studied and idolized wasn't actually him, because many of the things he said and the notes he left behind were not his own original creations.
Alfred was captivated by another great philosophy; Karen was merely its herald, a medium.
He wasn't truly that great.
Or rather, like Alfred, he was simply walking steadfastly along this path; because he believed in it, he possessed the courage to prove it.
It was powerful, it was correct, it was great—that was it, not him.
A phrase, a principle, an ideology—it did not truly fuse into oneself simply by reading the words and grasping a deeper meaning.
One had to pay a price, had to undergo grinding, had to... shed some blood.
Karen jerked backward, tumbling to the floor. The chain of Order binding Qianmei uncoiled. Qianmei was freed, yet it dared not run, curling up and continuing to shiver where it lay.
The crushing weight of hunger grew fiercer and fiercer, and the surrounding chains of Order sank into a state of agitated frenzy.
Karen raised his right palm. A flame of Light flickered into existence upon it, and he pressed it to his chest, allowing the flame to plunge directly into his body.
“Ssshh—!”
Karen curled up on the floor in agony as the flame of Light roasted his soul.
This was hardly an ingenious method; most addicts had tried something similar, using self-harm to distract themselves.
Karen was merely taking it to a higher level, moving beyond physical self-mutilation to strike directly at his own soul.
Roasting one's own soul was agonizing beyond measure from the very first instant.
Yet Karen did not give up. Enduring the immense torment, he continued to sustain the flame of Light.
Around him, the chains of Order also began writhing in pain, flailing and thrashing erratically.
“Still hungry...?”
“Go on, stay hungry...”
“Hungry now, are you...?”
Karen was in so much pain that snot and tears ran uncontrollably down his face, and blood trickled steadily from his eyes, ears, nose, and mouth. Yet he grinned with his mouth agape.
“Come on, keep tempting me...!”
“Come on, keep forcing my hand...!”
Kneeling on the floor with both hands braced against the tiles, Karen stared at the crimson pooling and spreading below him, his expression wild and ferocious:
“Come on! Let's tear each other apart!”
...
“Welcome to York City, you two.”
Muri stood before the entrance of the Church Affairs Building, greeting Mars and Blanche.
Unlike Muri, who carried only a single bag containing a shield and short sword, Mars had brought six suitcases, while Blanche had brought ten—all of them large ones.
Of course, this had to do with their specialized roles. Formation masters and priests truly required an extensive array of materials, and whatever they already had at home didn't need to be repurchased in York City. Besides, Blanche being a girl, having a bit more luggage was perfectly understandable.
While she carried the reserve typical of a priest—especially compared to the brash, carefree Ashley—her gentleness and intellectual aura were much stronger, which naturally required a wide variety of outfits and accessories to complement.
Mars smiled. “I can't help feeling it's a bit odd hearing that welcome from you.”
Muri replied nonchalantly, “That's what happens when I get here earlier than the rest of you.”
When the luggage was loaded into the hearse, the recess meant to hold a coffin couldn't even fit it all. Fortunately, the hearse's passenger compartment was also quite spacious, so it didn't feel crowded.
Alfred drove them to Allen Apartments to settle in, and once they were unpacked, he brought them over to the funeral parlor.
A taxi pulled up by the curb, and two figures stepped out: Richard and Mr. Memphis.
Alfred parked the hearse and called out to them, “Did you two arrive together?”
“You bet! I took a stroll over to the pastry shop and just happened to bump into Memphis browsing there too. This guy is secretly wicked to the bone. Whenever I offered to treat him to the pastry shop in the past, he kept turning me down. Turns out he was just too embarrassed, sneaking off there by himself! What, afraid of competing with me to see who lasts longer?”
Mr. Memphis stood beside Richard, looking completely calm.
Richard went on, “Sigh, if I hadn't been worried about running late for our gathering, I really would've liked to have a showdown in the adjoining rooms. Heh heh.”
In truth, Richard wasn't genuinely debauched. He had simply been sheltered by his family from a young age; as a pampered young master newly thrust into society, he had been led astray by the Hound Squad crowd, mistakenly believing that frequenting pastry shops was the hallmark of an adult male.
Alfred smiled, thinking to himself: It's a good thing you didn't go through with that contest.
“Are these the new squad members?” Richard asked, looking at the three people behind Alfred.
He had never seen Blanche, Mars, or Muri before.
“Yes,” Alfred nodded.
“Hello, new teammates! We're all one squad from now on. Here, let me introduce myself first: I'm dead weight, only dragged into this squad because of my good relationship with Karen. So when critical moments come, you don't need to count on me—in fact, you can just ignore me. But if you need anything in daily life, feel free to come to me anytime.
Come on over, I've prepared meeting gifts for everyone!”
Only then did Alfred notice the large bag Richard had been carrying all along. From it, Richard produced three exquisite gift boxes and handed them to Mars, Blanche, and Muri.
“Thank you.”
“Thank you.”
“Don't mention it, we're teammates after all, heh heh.”
The gifts inside had been handpicked by Richard. Half were local specialties, and the other half were as well, except they had to be bought with point coupons. Thus, whether in heartfelt sincerity or sheer coupon power, he had spared no effort.
“Alfred, er, I didn't prepare one for you. I ran out of point coupons. My dad borrowed money from me and never paid it back—what a beast.”
Memphis: “...”
While they were chatting, an exquisite pink luxury car pulled up. Ashley stepped out, threw her arms wide, and shouted:
“Dearest teammates, I missed you all so much!”
Blanche teased, “You mean you missed the captain, right?”
Ashley huffed and countered, “Didn't you miss him?”
“I did,” Blanche admitted honestly.
Richard nudged Memphis with an elbow and said, “See? Our Captain Karen is popular with the girls wherever he goes.”
Memphis said, “You're very popular on that street too.”
“Pfft, that's not the same! I pay money; with him, they'd pay to be with him.”
“Oh? Really.”
“I mean, Karen doesn't rely entirely on his face, but sometimes that face is just what's needed for the final touch of perfection. So it's all my dad's fault for committing a sin by not fathering me to be handsomer.”
“Mhm, indeed.”
A falcon flew in from above. After circling for a moment, Bart landed from it alongside Ventura.
Both possessed superb physical conditioning and suffered not the slightest harm from dropping from such a height.
Ashley quipped, “I know that as long as the falcon doesn't touch the ground, it doesn't count as using official falcons for personal business, but how on earth did you pick up Ventura?”
Bart laughed. “Just hovered outside his window. Though we did nearly startle his grandmother.”
Ventura hastily explained, “It's fine, my grandmother has seen falcons before.”
Ashley counted heads and said, “Can we head inside now?”
“Isn't there one more over there?” Memphis said, pointing toward a corner across the street.
“Hmm?”
Everyone turned to look and saw Philomena standing there all by herself.
Ashley gave a small chuckle. “To be honest, when I saw her name on the roster, I was pretty surprised.”
Bart countered, “Aren't you looking forward to it?”
Ashley smiled. “Yeah, definitely looking forward to it. Just thinking about how aloof she used to be, and how now she has to bow her head and join our squad, makes me feel pretty good inside.”
None of them truly objected to Philomena joining the squad, because after everything they had been through, they had already forged deep bonds with Karen.
Ashley lowered her voice. “Say, if we just walked in without calling her over, do you think she'd stand there all by herself until nightfall, until we finish eating?”
Bart agreed, “Quite possible, if we don't call her out. But the captain wouldn't do that; he's always had very proper conduct.”
Ashley curled her lip. “So we still have to call her over, then.”
Alfred said, “I'll go call her.”
Ashley quickly stopped him. “No, Ventura, you go. Let's see if she still dares put on airs. If she hasn't changed one bit, at least we'll know what to expect as teammates down the road.”
As she spoke, Ashley turned to explain to the others: “She's a very formidable woman, much stronger than Bart and me. Originally, she came from the same district as us, but because of her arrogant temper, the captain kicked her out of our squad.
Heaven knows how she ended up back in our squad this time. I'm not picking on her intentionally, but if she isn't willing to lower that noble head of hers and adjust her attitude, there's no point in us wasting our feelings trying to play nice as teammates.”
Bart teased, “Wise words from Vice-Captain Ashley.”
“Pah! Vice-captain has to be Muri no matter what. He used to be a captain himself, and now that he's seen the light and joined our side, he naturally has to set an example and appease the non–York City faction in our squad.”
Muri rubbed the tip of his nose.
Bart said, speechless, “Our squad hasn't even officially formed yet, and you're already dividing us into factions?”
“What's so strange about that? Even the cleaning ladies at my parents' research institute are split into three factions.”
Ventura ran across the street to call Philomena, and then Philomena walked back across the street with him.
Ashley nodded. “Not bad. Looks like she's changed a bit. Alright, now I can look forward to the feast the captain's preparing for us! Having eaten it once, I just can't forget it—truly unforgettable. By the way, what did we eat last time?”
Bart reminded her, “A simple meal at a funeral.”
The group walked into the funeral parlor together and made their way to the backyard.
Ashley shouted, “Where's my dear captain?”
The door to the master bedroom swung open, and Karen stepped out, clad in his divine robes of Order.
Everyone froze, startled by how dreadfully pale their captain looked.
Karen swept his gaze over everyone present.
With a faint smile, he said:
“You must all be hungry. I'll go prepare dinner.”
Chapter 399