Anbaixiu handed over the magic mirror free of charge, taking care to remind Zariel to be mindful of how she "negotiated" with Tiamat.
Taking this artifact from the God of Alchemy, Zariel vanished on the spot, looking as though she could hardly wait.
The moment she returned to Hell, Zariel set out immediately to find Tiamat, who was still sulking in her lair.
The Astral Gate was gone, the Astral red dragons were wiped out, only a few thousand Githyanki remained clinging to life, and every single plan had ended in total failure.
"Damn that lich!"
Lately, that was the phrase most frequently on Tiamat's lips.
When Zariel appeared wearing a radiant smile, the five-headed Dragon Queen asked suspiciously, "Your smile is dripping with malice and conspiracy. Have you found some mortal to toy with?"
An ordinary person wouldn't warrant such an expression from an Archduke of Hell; even Tiamat found her curiosity piqued.
"Indeed. I just negotiated a deal that should net ten million soul coins," Zariel said smugly.
Tiamat wore a look of sheer astonishment. Ten million! That was no trifling sum.
Souls weren't cheap trash like gold. How many souls descended into Hell each year, and how many devils across all the Nine Hells fought tooth and nail over them? Ten million was practically the entire population of a small nation!
"You're the one being swindled, aren't you?" Tiamat said without hesitation.
Who could possibly produce ten million soul coins? Had the Ryanites renounced the Lord of the Dawn and decided to subject their entire populace to a mass blood sacrifice? Even then, they couldn't slaughter that many.
Zariel said with self-satisfaction, "An ordinary person certainly couldn't, but what if it's that lich?"
Tiamat's golden pupils flared with radiant light—pure fury made manifest. Nowadays, she couldn't stomach hearing a single piece of news concerning that lich, unless it was word of his death.
Zariel tried tempting her, saying, "I know you're on bad terms with him, which is precisely why I came to find you. Don't you want your revenge? Just like last time, we can reap a million sinners in one go, along with a massive haul of soul coins."
Yet Tiamat scoffed, "I fear you've been duped by him yourself. Do you honestly think we came out ahead in that last deal?"
The Kingdom of the Unholy Hymn had originally been in the bag for the two Archdukes of Hell. The corruption and fall of an entire kingdom would have vastly elevated the renown of the First Layer of Hell, yielding immeasurable gains.
Yet under that lich's petty manipulations, that harvest had been drastically undercut.
Tiamat had suffered the worst of it. Because the terms of the deal were that Anbaixiu would help open the Astral Gate, Tiamat had yielded concessions to Zariel in exchange, allowing Zariel to swallow most of the profits.
In the end, the Astral invasion plan had failed, leaving Tiamat suffering such devastating losses she practically coughed up blood.
"Regardless, I asked for ten million this time, and he agreed. Not only that, but I negotiated a price on your behalf as well. He's willing to pay compensation for your Astral red dragons: sixty red dragons for six million soul coins—high quality, no less. How about that? Haven't I treated you well?"
"Six million?!"
Tiamat roared in fury. "Do you have any idea how much sixty red dragons are worth? How many years did I spend raising them on the Astral Plane?!"
"Dead things aren't worth a copper," Zariel mocked mercilessly. "At least now you can recoup a fraction of your losses."
Tiamat was struck speechless, yet she wasn't so easily fooled.
"For such a lucrative deal, you actually thought of me?"
Though the two were temporary allies, there was no true sentiment between devils. If Zariel hadn't kept such a windfall to herself and had gone out of her way to seek her out, something was bound to be amiss.
"If I could swallow it alone, I naturally wouldn't mind taking all the profit. But this time, the lich's request is far too absurd. My strength alone is far from sufficient; even with you added, it probably still wouldn't be enough."
Tiamat furrowed her brows deeply. She genuinely couldn't imagine what kind of request that lich could make that would put even Zariel in a bind.
"He wants to kidnap Blibdoolpoolp and present her to Talos."
Tiamat froze, looking as though she had just heard the most unfathomable thing in existence. After a long pause, she finally managed to choke out, "Has that lich finally lost his mind? Does he even know why deities are called deities?"
Zariel could hardly suppress a chuckle. She had thought the exact same thing at the time, but alas, Anbaixiu was offering far too much.
"I didn't inquire about his specific reasons, but this is the best bargain imaginable. He promised to handle locating Blibdoolpoolp and resolving the issue of her chaotic domain himself. All we have to do is step in and seize Blibdoolpoolp after he takes care of those problems. Doesn't that sound simple?"
When it came to dealing with a deity, those two obstacles were the greatest hurdles.
First, pinpointing their location and finding a way through the gates into their divine realm. Second, finding a way to counter the divine realm's suppressive influence on intruders.
If both problems were resolved, taking down Blibdoolpoolp would hardly be difficult for Zariel and Tiamat combined.
Tiamat asked, "Even if he fails to do so, will he still pay the commission?"
Zariel replied, "Naturally. Why else would I say it's guaranteed profit? However, since I brought you such a splendid deal, you'll have to split that six million with me fifty-fifty."
Tiamat retorted at once, "Out of the question! Besides, six million is far too little! That lich can create souls; his costs are vastly lower than killing mortals. Why did you only ask for ten million?! If I had opened negotiations, I would have demanded at least twenty million!"
"Then you can go negotiate with him yourself," Zariel said with an air of complete nonchalance.
"I merely wanted to play it safe and avoid any mishaps; after all, Blibdoolpoolp is an intermediate deity. If you're unwilling, I can go it alone. Of course, you can talk to the lich in person if you like. But given your history with him, how much do you suppose he'd offer you?"
Zariel wore an expression that said she had Tiamat entirely cornered. Yet Tiamat replied, "Zariel, we've known each other for a long time. I know your temperament inside and out. Those words just now were taught to you by that lich, weren't they? The next time you try to deceive someone, think first about whether it matches your usual habits."
Zariel's expression stiffened, as though her secret had been laid bare. Gritting her teeth, she said, "Fine. Since you've seen through it, I won't hide it from you. The lich believed my strength alone wasn't enough and insisted on dragging you in. Perhaps he intends to swindle you again."
"Then what was the actual offer?" Tiamat demanded.
Zariel said coldly, "Eight million each. I claimed your two million for myself."
"That's all?" Tiamat asked with lingering suspicion. "Can't he craft Simulated Souls at will? He ought to be far more generous."
Zariel sighed helplessly and explained, "It's his monopoly. He flatly refused to budge, claiming he's worried about devaluing Hell's soul coins, which would cause us even greater losses in the end. I don't understand economics, so I couldn't outargue him."
Tiamat hissed in fury, "That damned lich! He's nothing more than a counterfeiter!"
"Indeed. A counterfeiter who acts far too arrogant. But we don't have much of a choice, do we?"
"Can he truly neutralize the divine realm's influence over us?" Tiamat pressed. "If he cannot achieve that, none of this matters."
"It's even better if he fails! We collect the payment directly without lifting a finger, and we get to watch him make a fool of himself. I'm quite looking forward to seeing what punishment awaits that lich for breaking a pact with Talos. Back in the day, Velsharoon's blunder kept the gods talking for years."
"Then what reason do I have to refuse?"
Tiamat glanced at Zariel's hip and noticed that her sidearm was missing, likely given to the lich as a contract pledge.
Reaching up, Tiamat plucked a dragon scale from between her brows.
"Take this and give it to him. Tell him I agree to the deal. But it won't be eight million—it must be ten million soul coins. Not a single coin less."
Taking the dragon scale, Zariel couldn't help saying, "If you drive the price up like this, what if he refuses?"
Tiamat said resolutely, "Then we'll simply forfeit this profit. I would rather we all lose than let him have his way. Seeing that lich gain an advantage hurts worse than losing my own money! That is my price, and I will not yield an inch."
Zariel nodded and said, "Well spoken! In that case, I'll raise my price too! Ten million for each of us!"
Zariel departed with Tiamat's dragon scale. Only after ensuring she had entirely left Tiamat's territory, and carefully stowing the scale away, did she burst into uproarious laughter!
"Hahahahaha! That lich offered me twenty million and set aside sixty million for Tiamat, and now I've pocketed a clean seventy million! What a rush! Swindling someone else's money feels incredible! No wonder that lich loves doing business so much—it's practically an exhilarating battle!"
Having pulled off what was likely the most successful business deal of her entire life, Zariel couldn't resist contacting Anbaixiu immediately to flaunt her achievement.
When the dragon scale was delivered into Anbaixiu's hands, the lich put on an expression of deep lamentation and said to Zariel, "You drove the price down far too ruthlessly. If Tiamat ever finds out, she will despise you."
Zariel said dismissively, "We both live in Hell. Who cares who hates whom?"
"It still matters, doesn't it? Tiamat is your neighbor, after all. If she discovers the truth, she's bound to cause you trouble."
Anbaixiu's words struck Zariel as odd. Suspicious, she asked, "What do you mean by that? Are you thinking of ratting me out to Tiamat? Don't forget, you were the one who taught me that method."
Anbaixiu shook his head. "How could I? In my business dealings, I never play such pointless double-agent games. This won't be our only transaction; we'll have plenty of opportunities to cooperate in the future. Since I'm the one paying regardless, what difference does it make to me whether the money goes to you or to Tiamat?"
Zariel frowned. She vaguely sensed something was amiss. Could this lich have dug a pit and laid a trap for her?
Anbaixiu maintained his polite smile, but spoke to Zariel in an utterly earnest tone. "Rest assured, I will pay every last soul coin in full. But have you ever considered what will happen once such a massive volume of soul coins enters circulation? Won't Tiamat notice? After all, the gap between seventy million and ten million is not something easily overlooked."
Zariel demanded, "What exactly are you getting at?"
"What I mean is, you must not dump all these soul coins out at once. That would inevitably trigger rampant inflation. Not only would it devalue your existing assets and invite the wrath of the other Archdukes of Hell, but it would also instantly expose the fact that you swindled Tiamat."
"What good is having wealth if you can't spend it?!"
Zariel refused to accept that. She was no miser, nor could she simply sit on such a hoard. She had already planned out how to expend this immense fortune; asking her to hide it away untouched was out of the question.
"No, no, no. What I mean is, seventy million soul coins is a fortune vast enough to shake the economy of the entire Nine Hells. Why not be a little more ambitious? Zariel, have you ever considered taking control of the soul coin trade across all of Hell? Introducing this massive sum into Hell quietly isn't hard; the real challenge lies in magnifying its influence without alerting the other Archdukes of Hell."
"Just what are you trying to say?"
Zariel was beginning to feel light-headed. After talking in circles for so long, could it be done or not?
"What I'm saying is that you Archdukes of Hell generally isolate yourselves within your own fiefdoms, leaving your utilization of soul coins in an exceedingly primitive state. Naturally, the main reason is that soul coins are far too scarce and serve as consumable resources rather than standard currency substitutes. But that situation will not last much longer. As I continually produce soul coins, it will inevitably send shockwaves through Hell's economy.
"Zariel, have you ever thought about the grand deeds you could accomplish riding this wave?
"For instance... founding the very first Soul Coin Bank in Hell?"
Chapter 453