Lao Duozi, Are You Afraid?

Zhang Laifu hurriedly explained to Lao Duozi, "Senior, I went down the mountain and entered the city, and immediately went to buy tobacco. But before I could buy any, those two spotted me. I ran back for my life, and they chased me all the way. I ran all the way home, and they chased me straight into the house..." "Hold on!" Lao Duozi's jaw worked left and right, revealing a mouthful of snow-white teeth. "Laifu, you say you ran all the way back from the city, and they chased right behind you. Those two were craftsmen. If they really wanted to catch you, how could they have failed? How could you have made it back?" He had not expected that. A single sentence had exposed his flaw. Zhang Laifu had to give a plausible explanation. "I know the roads. Much better than they do." Lao Duozi shook his head. "Knowing the roads won't do you any good. The difference between you and them isn't just a tiny bit." Zhang Laifu explained again, "They wanted to take me alive, so they didn't kill me." Lao Duozi gripped Zhang Laifu's arm in a vise. "With their skills, dead or alive, they could take you however they pleased! Laifu, tell me the truth!" Zhang Laifu trembled all over. The bone-chilling cold that had vanished earlier suddenly flared up again. This old ghost was using yin energy again! "Laifu, tell the truth!" Lao Duozi's grip tightened. Zhang Laifu did not know how to explain, but then he caught sight of something on the ground. Beside Xiao Zhuzi's corpse lay a pipe, and hanging from the pipe was a small pouch. This pouch held tobacco leaves—Zhang Laifu had seen one like it with He Yunxi. "Senior, there's tobacco!" Lao Duozi's face lit up with surprise. "Where?" Zhang Laifu handed the pouch of tobacco to Lao Duozi. Lao Duozi felt it in his hands for a long time, then held it to his ear to listen. "This... doesn't seem to be enough..." From that action just now, Zhang Laifu confirmed two things. Lao Duozi could not perceive size; he did not know how big the pouch was. Lao Duozi could not perceive weight; he relied on sound to determine the amount of tobacco. Right now, only his hearing was relatively normal, which was likely the help provided by that alarm clock. "Senior, if there isn't enough tobacco, I'll go buy some right away." Zhang Laifu was just about to leave when Lao Duozi stopped him again. "Laifu, don't rush. First let me study whether this tobacco works. Come with me! Let me tell you, someone else came looking for you today. Searched the front and back courtyards, kept calling your name—no idea if they were looking for you alive or looking for your corpse." Looking for me? It was probably He Shengjun, the Lin family guard. Lao Duozi pulled Zhang Laifu toward the ancestral hall. As they reached the entrance of the main house, Lao Duozi tripped over the water cart. The cart clattered noisily, and Lao Duozi fell flat on the ground. "This wretched thing! Who had to leave it right in front of the door? Wretched thing..." Lao Duozi scrambled to his feet and went to kick the water cart, but his foot hung in midair, never kicking out. He seemed afraid to do it. This probably was not the first time the water cart had tripped him. Last night, Zhang Laifu had first heard the clatter of the water cart before encountering Lao Duozi, which proved he had been tripped once last night as well. Zhang Laifu stepped forward and said, "Senior, let me push this broken cart away so it stops tripping you." "Can you push it?" Lao Duozi's eyes gleamed; he clearly wanted this water cart moved out of the way. "I should be able to!" Zhang Laifu grabbed the handles and first dragged the water cart out from the doorway of the main house. Hearing the sound of the water cart, Lao Duozi beamed with delight. "Push it farther! The farther, the better! Push it to the front courtyard—better yet, push it right out of the manor!" Zhang Laifu pushed the cart to the center of the courtyard, looked back, and called out, "Senior, the wheels won't turn anymore." "Won't turn?" Lao Duozi asked anxiously. "Check if something's stuck!" If he was so anxious, why didn't he come check it himself? His ears were so sharp—couldn't he hear the condition of the wheels? "Senior, looks like the axle snapped." The axle was not broken, but Zhang Laifu stopped pushing and left the cart sitting in the middle of the courtyard. Lao Duozi was deeply disappointed. "Put some muscle into it! See if you can carry it out!" Zhang Laifu pretended to lift it a couple of times. "Too heavy, can't budge it!" Lao Duozi sighed. "Forget it. Leave the cart alone. Come with me." As long as Zhang Laifu was inside this courtyard, wherever he was, Lao Duozi could sense him. Yet this cart had tripped Lao Duozi twice. And when Zhang Laifu said the cart was broken, Lao Duozi simply believed him. Lao Duozi apparently could not sense this cart. And what was more, he was afraid of it. Zhang Laifu followed Lao Duozi into the ancestral hall. Lao Duozi placed the two men's craft essences on the altar table. He pulled the white fedora from inside his robe, set it on the table, and studied the tobacco pouch for a good while. Zhang Laifu asked, "Senior, should we pour the tobacco in?" "I don't dare pour it! If this tobacco really is the soil, the bowl will open." "Wouldn't opening it be a good thing?" "Once it opens, it won't stop! And this tiny bit of tobacco isn't enough..." Lao Duozi waved the tobacco pouch beside the fedora for a long time. The fedora twitched, but its reaction was not intense. "Should I use the tobacco or not?" Lao Duozi was also growing doubtful. Zhang Laifu asked, "How about we try something else?" "Laifu, you've had an exhausting day too. Go get something to eat. I made food for you and left it in that room where you sleep in the west courtyard." "Okay!" Zhang Laifu was just about to head to the west courtyard when Lao Duozi stopped him again. "Laifu, I made you some tiger skin peppers. Pretty spicy. You must eat them while they're hot—don't leave a single scrap. Once they go cold, they won't work anymore." "Won't work for what?" "You caught a chill. Only my peppers will cure it. Otherwise, you'll freeze to death tonight." The tiger skin peppers were meant to neutralize the yin energy. Zhang Laifu agreed, and as he turned to eat, Lao Duozi spoke again. "The tobacco pouch is with me. Where are the money pouches?" "Money pouches?" Zhang Laifu did not catch on for a second. Lao Duozi chuckled. "Silly boy, trying to play tricks on me? Both of those bandits had money pouches on them, filled with silver dollars, clinking and clattering. I heard every bit of it!" This old ghost truly loved money. Zhang Laifu handed over the money pouches belonging to Lao Yu and Xiao Zhuzi. Lao Duozi shook the pouches, listened to the clink of the silver dollars, and nodded with satisfaction. "Silly boy, you're young—you shouldn't be so greedy. I hate it when people try to embezzle my money. I won't shortchange you on what you deserve. Those two silver dollars for buying tobacco today, you can keep them. Now hurry up and go eat." Zhang Laifu went to the west courtyard. The meal was indeed ready. If he did not eat, the yin energy that had seeped into him earlier could cost him his life. As for whether the food was poisoned, Zhang Laifu had no way of knowing. The only thing he could be certain of was that Lao Duozi would not kill him before successfully opening the bowl. Truth be told, Lao Duozi was a good cook. The tiger skin peppers and vinegar-glazed cabbage in particular were delicious. His stomach full, Zhang Laifu lay on the bed to rest. Having run all day, he was utterly exhausted, and within ten minutes or so, he drifted off to sleep. The next morning, a tremendous crash from the main courtyard jolted Zhang Laifu awake. What was that racket? Just as Zhang Laifu was about to head to the main courtyard to see, Lao Duozi pushed the door open and stood by the bedside. "Laifu, wake up." Zhang Laifu replied, "I'm already awake." "Laifu, you'll have to trouble yourself with another trip to the city today." Zhang Laifu did not ask what he was to do in the city. Instead, he asked, "Senior, can't you go into the city yourself?" Lao Duozi let out a sigh. "I find it strange too—why didn't the tobacco work?" The response did not match at all. Lao Duozi could not hear what Zhang Laifu was saying; he was conversing purely by assumption. "Laifu, go into the city and buy some top-grade snuff. Make sure not to buy too little—at least one jin. I know this stuff is pricey, so here's your money!" Lao Duozi took out ten silver dollars and a large handful of copper yuan, laying them on the table. Then he pulled a small drum from inside his robe and handed it to Zhang Laifu. "Take this little drum with you. If you run into bad people, beat it once toward them. Remember this well: you can only beat it once. After one strike, the drum is ruined. When you strike it, you must keep your eyes locked on that person—never look into a mirror when you beat it! Our rule is the same as yesterday: you must be back before dark. If you're late, you won't live." Lao Duozi left. Zhang Laifu followed him to the main courtyard and looked around: the door panels of the ancestral hall were smashed to splinters, the doorframe had torn free, and half the wall had collapsed, rubble and broken bricks piled across the ground. "Laifu, don't dawdle! Hurry and buy the snuff!" Lao Duozi waved toward Zhang Laifu. He was covered in dust, red brick dust smeared across his sleeves. Had he knocked down half a wall? What had happened to make him throw such a massive tantrum? He could knock down half a wall, yet he could not touch that water cart? His earlier deduction was completely correct: Lao Duozi feared that water cart. This water cart was going to be immensely useful!