"Take deep breaths! Hang in there, you're definitely going to be fine!"
Geng Zhiwei had suffered a fatal wound, blood gushing in torrents from his neck.
"Hang in there, you can do it!" Li Banfeng thrust the Hanxue pendulum into Geng Zhiwei's neck, staunching the flow of blood.
Geng Zhiwei gasped desperately for air. He did not want to die. Even though his body was covered in injuries and he had suffered excruciating agony, he truly did not want to die.
Seeing Geng Zhiwei's condition worsening by the second, beads of sweat broke out on Li Banfeng's forehead. "Keep breathing! You must hold on!
"Think of your massive family estate—you wouldn't want to just hand it over to someone else, would you?
"Think of all your assets—you wouldn't want them carved up by others, would you?
"Think of all your concubines—you wouldn't want them crawling into another man's bed, would you?
"Deep breaths, hold on! You can't die yet!"
Hearing Li Banfeng's encouragement, Geng Zhiwei's breathing instantly grew rapid and forceful.
He refused to accept it. He could not bear to lose everything he possessed.
Driven by fury and indignation, his will to survive surged to an entirely new level.
Li Banfeng glanced over at the gramophone.
The soul of the first Martial Cultivator had already been devoured clean.
More than half of the second Martial Cultivator's soul was gone as well.
After ten or so minutes, the second soul had also been gulped down.
Li Banfeng wiped the sweat from Geng Zhiwei's brow. "You've suffered, Zhiwei. You've truly suffered. It's all right now—it's your turn. Relief is coming right away."
The only reason Li Banfeng had kept Geng Zhiwei holding on until now was that his wife wanted a fresh soul to eat.
It was just like hot pot: frozen meat tasted completely different from meat freshly slaughtered and swirled in the broth right there.
Geng Zhiwei felt a thin slice torn away from his left hand—an exceedingly sheer sliver.
In truth, his left hand was not injured at all; what was being torn apart was his soul.
Damage to his soul was like frost atop snow for the already feeble Geng Zhiwei.
Yet the piercing agony also kept him lucid throughout.
Droplets of liquid clung to the flare of the gramophone's horn, though whether they were sweat or drool was anyone's guess.
Li Banfeng asked, "Wife, how does it taste?"
"Fresh, truly so remarkably fresh! How could stale, aged souls ever compare to such prime ingredients? Husband truly dotes upon this humble servant!"
The so-called aged souls referred to the wronged ghosts she had eaten back at the old lady's home.
Those souls had been dead for who knew how many years; how could their texture compare to a fresh soul slaughtered and eaten right on the spot?
*Slurp!*
The gramophone took another long draft.
Li Banfeng possessed the Yin-Yang Eye. Unlike when Rong Jin'an had died, he could now clearly see a wisp of Geng Zhiwei's soul peel away, flying into the gramophone's horn like a strand of rice noodle.
Geng Zhiwei's expression was grotesque and contorted.
His eyes fixed upon Li Banfeng, and Li Banfeng felt his heart pounding faster and faster in his chest.
Contrary to the rumors, Geng Zhiwei was no white lamb; he possessed cultivation, being a first-tier Joy Cultivator.
Why had a first-tier Joy Cultivator, flanked by two second-tier Martial Cultivator guards, met their end at Li Banfeng's hands?
Because they had stepped into Li Banfeng's house.
Inside the house, the sheer power of a Dwelling Cultivator shocked even Li Banfeng himself.
Two Martial Cultivators who specialized in close-quarters combat were no match for Li Banfeng in either speed or strength.
Geng Zhiwei's Joy Cultivator arts had exerted some interference on Li Banfeng, but suppressed by the dwelling spirit, it had amounted to nothing more than a slight flutter in his pulse.
The three of them had only managed a single counterattack: Geng Zhiwei had induced an illusion in Li Banfeng, making him see Teacher Song dressed in her skirt suit and wearing glasses.
Taking advantage of Li Banfeng's brief hesitation, the two Martial Cultivators had moved to strike him down together.
Yet Li Banfeng had ducked into another room, capitalizing on the enemies' unfamiliarity with the layout to effortlessly defuse the crisis.
Then the gramophone had unleashed a vicious blast of steam, ending the fight on the spot.
It had been a pure, one-sided slaughter. If she hadn't feared harming Li Banfeng in the process, the gramophone would have finished the battle even faster.
With nearly half his soul slurped away, Geng Zhiwei was still not dead, continuing to employ his Joy Cultivator techniques to disturb Li Banfeng's mind.
Struggling to restrain himself, Li Banfeng's right hand began feeling over the gramophone.
"*Aiya-ya-ya~* Lord husband, what are you groping for?"
"Wife, we already share the reality of husband and wife. Why don't we consummate our marriage tonight?"
*Pfft!*
*Cough, cough, cough, cough!*
The gramophone, engrossed in slurping the soul, choked violently, sputtering out several plumes of water vapor amidst a fit of coughing.
The massive brass horn visibly flushed a deep shade of crimson in an instant.
"Th-this... husband, it is not that your servant is unreasonable, nor that your servant is unwilling to serve you with all her heart...
"It is just that this current body of your servant is far from useful, and I fear spoiling husband's mood!
"Husband, pray wait a few days for your servant to recuperate, and seek out a fine vessel!
"Your servant shall certainly devote every ounce of effort to ensure husband's complete delight, *aiya-ya-ya-ya~*"
Seeing the gramophone's flustered, awkward state, Li Banfeng pulled his hand back in bewilderment.
*What is wrong with me?*
*Why was I trying to make a move on a gramophone?*
*Are the arts of a Joy Cultivator truly this formidable?*
Li Banfeng looked at the pendulum. Geng Zhiwei's blood was stored inside it, but the pendulum was completely full now. Where could he store more blood?
Was there any way to preserve blood?
Seeing Li Banfeng fall silent, the gramophone hurriedly explained, "Husband, you have fallen prey to that scoundrel's Passion-Charming Heart-Scorching technique! The methods of Joy Cultivators are simply so vile and filthy!
"Husband, fret not! Your humble servant shall avenge you! You scoundrel of a Joy Cultivator, stop squirming—watch as I devour you strand by strand!"
Watching the gramophone slurp down the soul, Li Banfeng once again could not resist reaching out to touch it, scaring the gramophone into another coughing fit.
"*Cough, cough, cough!* Husband, dear, perhaps you should take refuge in the outer chamber for a moment?"
Just as Li Banfeng was about to go hide in the outer chamber, he suddenly felt that something was missing from the main room.
What was missing?
After a moment's thought, Li Banfeng remembered. "Where did all the herbs and pills I brought back go?"
Still slurping the soul, the gramophone sang out, "Husband, dear, your humble servant found all those bottles and jars an eyesore, so I sent them to the outer chamber!"
Li Banfeng hurried into the outer chamber.
When he had taken cover here during the skirmish earlier, he hadn't noticed. Now, lighting a candle and inspecting closely, he saw jars and bottles strewn everywhere, and even the wooden chest holding the pills had been smashed to pieces.
His wife was far too rough!
Li Banfeng moved to check whether the herbs had been damaged, but picking up several jars, he found them completely empty.
What was going on?
The medicinal herbs were gone?
He turned over the overturned wooden box on the floor, only to find the pills missing as well!
Where had all those good things gone?
Li Banfeng looked toward the bronze lotus. Its petals were tightly shut, bathed in a glowing aura—it was refining pills.
It had swallowed the pills and medicinal herbs, and was now refining pills with them!
Fuming with frustration, Li Banfeng marched out of the outer chamber, returned to the main room, and began groping all over the gramophone again.
Startled, the gramophone sang out, "Husband, dear~~ have your urges still not settled down?"
"Wife, dear~" Li Banfeng also broke into song. "Where might the peaches below your waist be right now?"
The gramophone faltered, stammering in song, "Your humble servant... has not grown any peaches yet-ah!"
"Once you grow those peaches, stick them out at once so I can give you a sound thrashing!"
The gramophone stammered, "Th-this... why would husband beat your servant?"
"You squandered all the pills and medicinal ingredients I worked so hard to acquire! Don't you deserve a beating?"
The gramophone sounded bewildered. "Th-this... your servant merely sent those things to the outer chamber, I didn't ruin them at all-ah~~"
"You sent them to the outer chamber, and the bronze lotus ate them all! There's nothing left now!"
"Th-this... this, this..." The gramophone stuttered for a good while before singing out once more, "If there is blame, it lies entirely with that wretched vixen, Red Lotus~~ That slut is so greedy, and now she has upset husband! Husband, do not be wroth, husband, please don't..."
"Enough, stop singing!" Li Banfeng glanced at Geng Zhiwei's corpse. "Are you done eating this soul?"
The gramophone hastily replied, "Finished eating it all! Thank you for doting on me, husband!"
"Now that you're done, clean up after yourself. Send the corpse into the outer chamber and give it to the lotus."
*Hiss, hiss!*
The gramophone gave two snorts, whining resentfully, "Why does husband dote on that wretched Red Lotus so much?"
Li Banfeng gave a cold chuckle and sang in response, "Because a lotus heart has seven holes-ah~~"
With that, Li Banfeng walked away.
The gramophone puffed out a cloud of steam and muttered to herself, "What's so great about seven holes? Aren't three horns enough for him?
"Forget it, who knows what kind of madness this lunatic has caught now!"
***
Li Banfeng emerged from the Portable Abode and retrieved his key near the Geng Family Medicine Shop.
The blaze consuming the Geng Family Medicine Shop had not subsided. Members of the Geng family were frantically trying to extinguish the fire, while neighboring residents had all fled outdoors to escape the disaster.
In truth, all of that was unnecessary.
Old Mr. Yao had already stated that his medicinal wine could only be drunk inside the courtyard and was never to be taken outside.
This fire would not harm anyone else.
As for the Geng family, not a scrap of their compound would remain; fighting the fire was utterly futile.
Li Banfeng slipped away from the Geng Family Medicine Shop without a sound, walking briskly down the street.
It was not merely to avoid the Geng family; he had urgent business to attend to.
He had holed up inside all day today, which was more than enough cultivation for a Dwelling Cultivator, but his progress as a journey cultivator was lagging far behind.
Opening the address Yu Nan had left him, Li Banfeng set out to find Yaowanggou's newland.
Li Banfeng truly wanted to see what that newly born land was like.
Chapter 67