I Have an Affection

Li Banfeng knew his wife's singing could summon ghosts; Shopkeeper Feng had mentioned this to him before. He had originally planned to carry his wife out to resolve the matter directly, but she had told him that a dwelling spirit could not leave the house. That was secondary, though; her main point was that a married woman shouldn't always be showing her face in public—grocery shopping was a chore Li Banfeng had to do himself. His wife had cut a record for him, and it was this very tune—"I Have an Affection." All the ghost servants listened enraptured, as if oblivious to Li Banfeng's presence. In truth, they weren't oblivious; when Li Banfeng cranked the gramophone just a bit too fast, the ghost servants grew annoyed at once, glaring daggers at him. Cranking a gramophone was truly skilled work. Li Banfeng controlled the crank with one hand while using his key to unlock the Portable Abode with the other. All the ghost servants turned their heads almost at the same time, looking toward the door of the Portable Abode. "I have an affection to share, Sung for the spring wind to hear. Spring wind, ask him on my behalf: Why has he cut off all word?" Without the slightest hesitation, the ghost servants followed Li Banfeng into the Portable Abode. Through the doorway, they heard singing even sweeter—sweeter still than the hand-cranked gramophone. *** Zhou Yujuan woke with a sudden start from her slumber and vigorously shook awake Du Hongxi, wind patrol of the Jiangxiang Gang's Medicine King Hall Second Branch, beside her. "Master, Master, wake up! There's a stir on the ground floor; I heard the gramophone playing." Du Hongxi rubbed his eyes and rolled over. "Let it play, then. Doesn't that thing play every day?" "Master, stop sleeping! I really heard something!" "Just let me rest a bit!" Du Hongxi shoved Zhou Yujuan away. "I'm completely spent; stop tormenting me!" Zhou Yujuan listened intently for a moment. The singing from the ground floor seemed to have faded. Had she really misheard? Zhou Yujuan dug at her ear. It felt clogged with something—probably left behind by Du Hongxi just now. Confirming she heard nothing more, Zhou Yujuan went back to sleep, but Du Hongxi suddenly sat bolt upright. "Master, what's wrong?" Zhou Yujuan asked with concern. "Nothing. Taking a leak." Du Hongxi got out of bed. Zhou Yujuan said, "Master, there's a chamber pot under the bed." "Not using that; feels awkward!" Du Hongxi silently left the bedroom. Zhou Yujuan wanted to follow, but Du Hongxi glared her back. He didn't want to pee; he had lost his psychic connection to his ghost servants. Losing connection to one or two ghost servants temporarily—whether due to battle or something else—was something Du Hongxi had encountered before. But losing touch with all his ghost servants at once was a first. Du Hongxi was nervous, even somewhat panicked. He didn't tell Zhou Yujuan, nor did he tell anyone else. Deprived of his ghost servants, Du Hongxi was virtually stripped of all combat strength. He didn't trust a soul right now. He headed down toward the end of the hallway, where two of his subordinates were staying—subordinates with cultivation. They had some skill to speak of, though he hadn't called upon them to fight in years. Just as he neared the end of the hall, an iron ruler was suddenly pressed against the bald back of Du Hongxi's head. "Who's inside this room?" Li Banfeng asked softly. "Inside..." "Keep it down." Li Banfeng used the iron ruler to drill a hole in the back of Du Hongxi's head. Du Hongxi's entire body convulsed. How could something like this happen? Ever since Du Hongxi attained tier two as a Nightmare Cultivator, his life had never faced a threat of this magnitude. With his cultivation, he could make his ghost servants do many things. With his cultivation, even tier-three departed souls could be refined into ghost servants by him. But without his ghost servants, what else could he do? He could still summon new ghost servants. Du Hongxi focused his mind and poured all his effort into summoning departed souls. Were there still departed souls nearby? Yes, plenty! The one thing Puluo Province never lacked was departed souls. Near the dance hall were two evil spirits. They had killed people and drunk blood; though they lacked cultivation tiers, they struck viciously enough, ready for use the moment they were summoned. Li Banfeng shoved the iron ruler nearly half an inch deeper into Du Hongxi's skull. "I asked you who's inside." Du Hongxi shuddered, not expecting this bastard to be so ruthless. "They're two of my subordinates." Li Banfeng gently twisted the iron ruler. "What kind of subordinates?" "Subordinates who've followed me for over a decade! Stalwarts who kill without blinking an eye!" Though sounding like tough talk, he was actually stalling for time. Sensing the summons, the departed souls flew toward the dance hall. The iron ruler worked up and down inside the back of Du Hongxi's skull. Li Banfeng said, "I asked what pathways those two subordinates cultivate, and what tiers they are." "Both are body cultivators, tier one." "What kind of body cultivators? Birds? Beasts? Or bugs?" "Neither birds nor beasts; they'd probably count as bugs." The two departed souls had already arrived near the dance hall. "What kind of bugs?" Li Banfeng's iron ruler probed deeper and deeper. "One is a centipede, and the other is a longworm." A longworm? Isn't a longworm a snake? Do snakes count as bugs too? The two evil spirits had already reached the outside of the western-style building and slowly slipped through the walls. His chance had come! Du Hongxi prepared to command the evil spirits to ambush Li Banfeng, but Li Banfeng thrust the iron ruler two inches into the back of his head with his right hand, neutralizing Du Hongxi's ability to resist first. Turning the key with his left hand to unlock the Portable Abode, Li Banfeng dragged Du Hongxi into the house. He didn't rush to close the door; two evil spirits were still following behind. These two evil spirits indeed possessed some combat ability, but were far from having any cultivation; how could their malice ever escape Li Banfeng's notice? The reason he brought them into the Portable Abode was simply to add a dish for his wife. *Gurgle—* The fifteen ghost servants hadn't even been finished yet, and the gramophone was so stuffed it was burping continuously. "Wife, save those dried greens for later. Eat this fresh soul while it's hot." With the back of his head damaged, Du Hongxi was paralyzed. In the pitch-black room, he saw the remaining six ghost servants. Du Hongxi marshaled his will, trying to command them to attack Li Banfeng. The ghost servants didn't budge an inch, as if petrified under a spell. Unable to command the ghost servants, Du Hongxi instead directed the evil spirits to pounce on Li Banfeng. Li Banfeng had Yin-Yang Eyes and saw everything crystal clear. He dodged the evil spirits, and after a burst of steam, the evil spirits turned into smoke and dust, sucked right into the gramophone's horn. *Clang-clatter—* "Aiya, husband, these two dried greens are a bit spicy~" Powerless to struggle, tears streamed steadily down from the corners of Du Hongxi's eyes. What kind of monster was this? What kind of place was this? "Wife, hurry and eat this fresh one while it's hot. I still have use for his corpse." *Hoo—hoo—* Du Hongxi couldn't speak; only heavy, wheezing gasps escaped his throat. A mist of vapor enveloped him, the searing agony making him vomit white froth. He felt his body being sliced into fine threads, sucked one by one into the gramophone. In reality, his body hadn't changed much; what was being torn to shreds was his soul. The gramophone devoured Du Hongxi's soul and, while at it, tidied up his corpse—wiping away the blood and smoothing over the wounds until he looked completely intact. Du Hongxi's corpse still had its uses; this was part of the tactic Li Banfeng had devised. Hauling Du Hongxi along, Li Banfeng left the Portable Abode and arrived at the door of the two subordinates. Du Hongxi had said they were body cultivators, one a centipede and the other a longworm. Had he spoken the truth? Li Banfeng didn't think so. He propped up Du Hongxi's body, keeping him upright before the door as best he could, and then knocked. Only after a long while of knocking did the door open. One of the two subordinates was stark naked, while the other had a short jacket draped over his shoulders, both still dazed with sleep. Seeing how sluggish they were, they didn't seem as sharp and agile as a centipede or a snake. These two subordinates had indeed followed Du Hongxi for a long time, but with ghost servants guarding him, Du Hongxi rarely had any need for them to lift a finger. Seeing Du Hongxi standing at the door, they failed to realize at first glance that he was a corpse. Another person stood behind Du Hongxi, but the naked subordinate paid no heed to the young stranger, asking Du Hongxi directly, "Big Brother, what's going on?" Du Hongxi didn't answer. The young man behind him spoke up. "Nothing much. Big Brother just missed you." Li Banfeng slashed his blade, slitting the naked man's throat. The man in the jacket was shocked, drawing in a sharp breath of horror. Li Banfeng seized the opening to shoot an emerald-green poison pill straight into his mouth. The man was reasonably quick on his feet; he spat out the poison pill with all his might and traded two blows with Li Banfeng. But spitting it out was useless now; the venom had already spread down his throat, and severe swelling plunged the man into instant suffocation. The two subordinates stood at the doorway, clutching their throats in unison. Using the poison pill for the first time, Li Banfeng hadn't been entirely sure of its potency. But seeing the poisoned man lose all ability to resist within a dozen-odd seconds, Li Banfeng developed a high regard for the pill. Not only was it potent, it took effect rapidly; one didn't even need to swallow it down—merely touching a trace of it was enough to poison someone. Seeing both men fading fast, Li Banfeng dared not dawdle. He quickly opened the Portable Abode, turned back, and asked: "Forgot to ask—what pathways do you two cultivate? "Why aren't you speaking? "Neither of you wants to talk? "Fine if you don't want to say, but you must tell me next time. "Don't rush to die just yet. Grit your teeth and hang on a bit longer; someone back home is still waiting for dinner."