Punishment

Yaxiu was not in the least surprised by Weise's thoughts. Weise possessed the most vibrant vitality of anyone he had ever met. Only Tamashi could rival her blazing radiance; everyone else seemed to pale in comparison. That wasn't to say the Sword Princess or the Witch weren't remarkable, but only in the absurd, murky blight of the Senluo land could such intensely brilliant, breathtakingly alluring blossoms as the Silver Lantern and the Black Crow ever bloom. Beings as magnificent as they were seemed utterly out of place in the Senluo wasteland. At first, Yaxiu had assumed a land rife with chaos and slaughter was fit only for the wheeling of carrion vultures. Yet it seemed that precisely because Senluo was so twisted and grotesque, where the slightest misstep meant eternal damnation, life within it was forced to burst forth with pure, unadulterated passion. Without such fierce obsession, one could not survive; without burning so brilliantly, one's flame would be snuffed out. As the last Senluo people, the Silver Lantern and the Black Crow were practically the living embodiment of Senluo civilization. Their vitality burned so fiercely that they had to find a grand, beautiful vessel to house their overwhelming sense of self, an outlet through which to channel their boundless conviction and passion. Otherwise, sooner or later, they would succumb to emptiness and consume themselves—like a roaring blaze starved of fuel, racing toward self-destruction. In Yaxiu's eyes, the Black Crow and the Silver Lantern were essentially the same kind of person. The Black Crow's vessel was "Absolute Justice," while the Silver Lantern's vessel was "World Destruction." Though their goals were antithetical and they despised each other, both were saints walking the earth. Ordinary Senluo people required the grand laws as their faith because they were not saints. Faced with distant, unreachable ideals, they would waver and doubt; without a faith to anchor themselves, they would collapse from within. Only the Black Crow and the Silver Lantern were so extraordinary that they needed no external validation. They could persevere toward near-impossible goals, striving through sheer willpower to turn the tide of an era. If a wise man says, *“History, I know where you are going,”* and a great man says, *“History, carry me forward,”* then a saint proclaims, *“History, I forbid you to tread this path.”* That was precisely the kind of people they were. They did not need faith; they were faith itself. Compared to them, even Vichy seemed somewhat eclipsed. Not that Vichy lacked ambition or vision, but she had failed too many times, over far too long a span. As the saying goes, the first drumbeat rouses the spirit, the second falters, and the third exhausts it. Vichy was like a war drum buried beneath centuries of dust, unplayed for ages and thickly caked in grime. She had grown lifeless along with it, able only to cling tenaciously to the ambition buried in her heart, gritting her teeth and holding out until now. No matter how arrogant and cruel she acted, it could not hide the fact that she was a failure—someone who had been fleeing ever since three thousand years ago. After deserting the battlefield for so long, one could never muster the courage to march onto it again. Yaxiu had still been drawn to Vichy even after losing his memories of her, partly out of lingering affection, but mostly because of the vitality gradually rekindling within her. Compared to female sorcerers like the Sword Princess and the Witch, who had never suffered true hardship, Vichy had constantly lived in a state of restless anxiety. Once Yaxiu shared his wonders with her, even if it wasn't obvious on the outside, she gave off a presence that felt far brighter and more radiant. It wasn't love or gratitude. It was more like that dust-laden war drum being struck with a mighty hammer—the dust scattering in a rush of wind, the heart locked within roaring to life. She had wandered too long and tasted defeat too often; she desperately needed tangible validation and progress to reignite her life. Yet both Vichy and the Black Crow were still on the path of chasing their dreams. Weise was different... She had already completed the mission passed down through the Grey Fox inheritance, destroyed the Senluo wasteland, and decided the fate of tens of millions of Senluo souls. She had reached her end. Much like someone who had attained total financial freedom, Weise could have chosen to live entirely as she pleased. Yet her overwhelming sense of self would never permit her to drift through an idle existence. For more than twenty years, she had burned through her very life. If she didn't find a new vessel to anchor herself, her only choice would be to self-destruct in emptiness. Standing at this bewildered crossroads, the choice that could simultaneously satisfy the continuation of life, the reproductive instinct, and her need for love was utterly irresistible to her. Yaxiu asked himself honestly: if there was anyone he would be willing to have a child with right now, it truly was only the Silver Lantern. Leaving Vichy aside, both the Sword Princess and the Witch were too young; their fleeting impulses could easily override their reason, and they might very well come to regret it in the future. Only the Silver Lantern was a mature woman in Yaxiu's eyes. Any decision she made would have been considered with all its consequences fully in mind—she was a partner he could truly entrust his faith to. "Still..." Yaxiu hesitated, his voice uncertain. "You're already..." "Yes, a god cannot bear children," Weise murmured softly. "Not just because I'm a completely different form of life from you, but because gods simply lack the capacity to reproduce. Besides, if you could actually have children with a god, things would be disastrous. The Sword Princess wouldn't just have to watch out for us—she'd have to keep an eye on gods like Soul Lock, Shattered Lake, and Gospel too." By the end of her sentence, she was already chuckling. "Still, it's quite fascinating to think about. If we had a child, would she be human, a sorcery spirit, or a god?" The god nestled against the sorcerer's chest, listening to the human heartbeat. "Whether a boy or a girl, I hope their personality would be like yours, not mine." "Why?" "Because someone like me lives a very bitter, exhausting life." Weise's voice was exceedingly faint, as though she feared her words might become a curse. "And I'm not very likable, either." "That's true," Yaxiu said, nodding solemnly. "After all, I'm already a demigod, so I hardly count as human. The fact that I like you can't really be used as proof that you're likable." "Still, do you really care whether other people like you or not? Did you save the world just so you could watch a bunch of strangers applaud you?" Yaxiu poked her waist, feigning indignation as he asked, "Isn't my affection enough to satisfy you?" "Yaxiu, aren't you being a little too full of yourself...?" "Huh?" Seeing Yaxiu put on a dejected face, Weise burst into a giggle. She reached over to feed him another sip of pineapple juice, speaking in the tone one might use to coax a child. "But that confidence of yours is exactly what I like. Even if the entire world dislikes me, as long as you like me, I'm completely content. "Besides, being with you has made me foolish too. If we really had a child, would we ever let her suffer? Even if she turned out to have a personality just like Vichy's, we wouldn't let her be wronged." "Don't say that... You're scaring me..." Yaxiu's lips twitched. "If my kid turned out to have Vichy's personality, it would only prove my parenting was absolute garbage..." "No need to worry," Weise said with a quiet laugh, looking at Yaxiu. "After all, it's impossible for me to have a child with you in the first place. "I can never have children, I can never be a mother, and I can only ever remain a god who relies on you." The tent suddenly fell silent. The eight silver-glowing crystals seemed to dim. "I'm not complaining, nor do I think it's unfair. This is the price I ought to pay," Weise said. "This world was completely shattered because of me, and tens of millions died because of me. No matter what punishment I receive, none of it would be too harsh. To think I could still awaken my sense of self and remain by your side as a god—what more could I ask for? I got what I deserved." Yaxiu shook his head repeatedly. "I don't think you did anything wrong. If it weren't for you—" "If it weren't for me, the living souls of Senluo would have plunged into an even more tragic apocalypse," Weise said. "But what right did I have to make that choice for them? Just because an action is right, does that mean one has the authority to decide other people's fates? "In the end, what difference is there between me and the Divine Lord of Stars who destroyed the Cage of All Stars? Both of us merely followed the justice we believed in and shed the blood of others. "Yaxiu, the only reason you're so forgiving of me is that you pity me," she said softly. "You feel that I paid a terrible price." "Or maybe it's just that I'm a scumbag with double standards." Yaxiu kissed Weise's forehead and gently stroked her back, smiling. "I'll make excuses for the people I like. Because I like you, everything about you is good. "Still, I thought your way of thinking would be closer to the Divine Lord of Stars—the sort who thinks, *'I have the power to decide their fates, so that's what I'll do, and I don't care what they think.'*" Weise refilled the cup of pineapple juice and nodded as she fed it to Yaxiu. "I truly don't care what they think, but that doesn't mean I deny my sins... I simply possess the resolve to pay the price, and I am willing to bear all consequences. "You might think the price I paid was losing my mortal body, turning into a god, or being trapped in the dark Senluo to spend the rest of my days making amends for my crimes." Weise raised her eyes and looked up at Yaxiu. "In truth, that isn't it. Those misfortunes don't count as punishment to me at all; they don't bring me the slightest pain. "The greatest punishment fate ever inflicted upon me was meeting you, Yaxiu," she whispered. "All my pain, all my regrets, stem from you... You are the instrument of torture that torments me most of all."