Acting spoiled comes from sensing the possibility of being favored; being sensible comes from sensing the prospect of being abandoned.
And so, at this moment, Lisi was both acting spoiled and behaving remarkably sensibly. Paying no heed whatsoever to the voices of her elder sisters, she stared wide-eyed at Yaxiu.
Her world was very small—so small that losing any single person would leave it utterly hollow. That was why she was willing to betray anything, even truth and justice, for any one of them.
Yaxiu looked at her, patted his pockets, and, finding neither handkerchief nor tissue, had to wipe the milk stains from her cheek with his sleeve. He chuckled. "Did you forget? I have a Contract with you, and I also have a Contract with the young lady."
"But Aunt Annan likes you a lot!" Lisi said anxiously. "She definitely wouldn't have the heart to—"
"She would," Yaxiu said. "Maybe Annan has a good impression of me, maybe she even likes me a little. But liking someone isn't as omnipotent as you imagine. In fairy tales, affection can cross mountains, overturn destiny, and flatten the seas, but in reality, it's completely useless. The brief euphoria it brings can't even compare to Harvey's candy.
"Her liking toward me might be the liking between friends, or liking a pet, or maybe even a little affection toward the opposite sex. But it's absolutely not something elevated above life itself. For the divine wish, she can even use her own life as a bargaining chip. What do I count for?"
Yaxiu ruffled Lisi's hair. "You'll understand in the future. Whether it's love or resentment, they're merely emotions bred by hormones, illusions spawned by life. You can chase or even indulge in these illusions, but they cannot fill your life. Only ideals, living, and meaning can make you grow into an outstanding woman."
For some reason, hearing Yaxiu preach to her so solemnly made Lisi's nose tingle with a sting of tears, and her vision grew watery and blurred. Pouting, she mumbled, "Papa, are you really qualified to say something like that? You don't look like you have any ideals either."
"My apologies for being such a shallow adult and setting a bad example for you," Yaxiu scratched his cheek awkwardly. "Of course, while I really hope you grow up to be an outstanding, beautiful woman, if you end up as ordinary as me in the future, I'd still be very happy. Sometimes, being able to live like in stories—'in the blink of an eye, they lived decades of ordinary days'—is already immense happiness."
"I'm definitely going to grow into a super cute, great beauty!" Lisi sniffled hard. "But Papa, why do you talk like you definitely won't be around to see it? The more you talk like that, the more scared I get! If it's so dangerous, why not resist that bad woman Annan instead of having to accompany her to your death?
"Oh, right! Aunt Bogin and Uncle Harvey definitely won't just comply meekly. Let's go consult with them, resist Annan's tyranny! Freedom belongs to us—"
"They won't join your conspiracy."
Lisi froze. "Why?"
"Because Annan offered a price higher than freedom," Yaxiu smiled. "A divine wish."
"But can't only one person obtain a divine wish—"
"Annan proposed another possibility," Yaxiu said. "A divine wish definitely can't grant literally everything. So naturally, it must have a 'wish capacity.' As long as it remains within this capacity, all our wishes can be granted—no matter how many there are.
"Annan said that although her wish can only be granted by the Omniscient Weaver, it isn't anything grand or momentous. It's practically trivial. Therefore, if there is still 'wish capacity' left over, she is more than happy to grant our wishes."
Lisi strained to find an argument to refute him. "B-but that's just Annan's one-sided claim! The Omniscient Weaver might not be so easygoing. Maybe He will only fulfill Annan's single wish, and then all of your hard work will have been for nothing!"
"But at least there is hope, isn't there?" Yaxiu smiled. "Even though hope without results is poison, we... well, Igola and Harvey's lives are already like that. How could they resist dreaming a happy dream?
"Lisi, you have to understand: me, Igola, and Harvey are all homeless foreigners. Sometimes I also think, isn't it just leaving home to live in an unfamiliar city? How hard can it be? But the moment I realize the past can only be savored through memory, severed completely from the previous twenty-odd years of our lives... no matter how cold our hearts seem like iron, our blood is still warm.
"When Harvey smokes and stares outside all the time, what is he really looking at? When Igola takes a bath, what is he really thinking about?"
Lisi asked, "Papa, do you miss your home too?"
Yaxiu smiled, gathered Lisi into his arms, and asked in return, "Do you smell anything?"
Lisi sniffed hard in his embrace. "Water, clothes, and a little bit of shampoo... Huh? Weren't we at the Happy World all day? Papa, when did you wash your hair?"
"Well, hanging around a bunch of people who are either cute or beautiful, I obviously have to put effort into my appearance. Otherwise, I'd sink down to Harvey's level." Yaxiu shrugged. "So, is this a scent familiar to you?"
"Yeah."
"Then this is the scent of home."
Lisi asked nervously, "So Papa, do you guys want to return home?"
"At least Igola and Harvey don't. After all, some things are only suitable for reminiscing in memory," Yaxiu said. "Yearning for home only proves that we still can't live at ease, so like stray dogs, we can only dig up a few bones from the graveyard of our memories to stave off hunger. That is why Igola and Harvey are willing to take risks with Annan—they want to obtain the power to hold onto happiness."
"But aren't they very strong already? Aunt Bogin will become the Rust Crow, and Uncle Harvey can even become a Legendary Sorcerer commanding gods in the future," Lisi said. "Just how much power do they need to hold tightly onto their happiness?"
"A very good question. Perhaps they're also hoping the Omniscient Weaver can give them an answer." Yaxiu held out his hands. "In any case, you can't count on them."
"Then what about you, Papa?" Lisi asked. "What is your wish?"
"Me?" Yaxiu paused slightly, thought about it, and said, "My true wish... even the Omniscient Weaver cannot grant it, and I wouldn't dare let Him grant it either."
If he wished to the Omniscient Weaver to return to his homeland, setting aside whether the Omniscient Weaver could even do it, it would be terrifying if He actually could—if a god turned their gaze upon that clear, azure planet, Yaxiu, as the one who guided them there, would become an unforgivable sinner condemned ten thousand deaths over.
"As for my secondary wish..." He paused. "I want to see someone."
"Who?"
"Someone very important to me," Yaxiu pinched Lisi's little cheek, "just as important as you. But while I want to see her, I'm also afraid to see her."
"Why?" Originally, Lisi felt a twinge of jealousy, but upon hearing this, her curiosity was instantly piqued. "Does that person not want to see you?"
"I don't know. Let's assume she wants to see me. It's just..." Yaxiu said, "once I actually see her in reality, I might have to abandon my true wish."
"Why? Do the two wishes conflict?"
"Theoretically, they don't. But it's like a stray dog adopted by humans: it would have no motivation to scramble for food outside anymore, able only to maintain the happiness of being a house pet. Or like that balloon you bought today—from then on, its string would be held tight by you, unable to fly selfishly toward the sky."
Lisi half-understood. "Then, Papa, is your wish to see that person?"
"No," Yaxiu said. "First, I haven't made up my mind yet—half-baked resolve won't do. Second, she has her own life and isn't ready to see me yet. Third, it's unnecessary; seeing her is only a matter of time, so there's no need to waste a wish on it."
"Then what on earth is your wish, Papa?"
"That's exactly what I wanted to discuss with you."
"Huh?" Lisi blinked in surprise, then pondered. "Papa, your popularity in the Gospel Country is so terrible right now. How about wishing for everyone to like you? Or more simply, obtaining the power of a Legendary Sorcerer? Wait, a Legendary Sorcerer might require too much wish capacity. You should make a cost-effective wish that's effortless for the Omniscient Weaver but provides a noticeable boost for you..."
Just as Lisi was pondering what wish to make, Yaxiu shook his head.
"I wasn't asking you to come up with a wish for me. I wanted to ask you: what is your wish?"
"Huh?" Lisi raised her head, looking at Yaxiu in bewilderment.
"Back in the Four Pillar Cult's underground hall, although Annan tried to intimidate you, you're a smart kid. If you didn't want to join the Funeral Agency, as long as you stubbornly refused, Annan and Cleios wouldn't have done anything to you. They aren't so cruel that they would kill a little girl solely on the pretext of being an outlander," Yaxiu said. "Coupled with how you egged me on to plot against Annan that very night, I knew you only seized the opportunity to join Funeral for some wish of your own."
Lisi opened her mouth, but not a single word came out; she could not refute him.
The trial of the Bronze Dragon granted her aid through all sorts of coincidences, bringing her ever closer to her goal, an effect that remained active to this day—being captured by the Four Pillar Cult, joining Funeral, and traveling all the way to Nabistin, she was now merely half a step away from her goal.
"What is that wish—the one you're determined to accomplish even if it means maneuvering among adults and striving all on your own?" Yaxiu asked. "Can you tell me?"
"I..." Lisi mumbled, "Papa, could it be you want to grant my wish?"
"Depends. If you want a fairy-tale romance between a prince and a princess, I can only prepare a nicer pillow for you so you can sleep more soundly." Yaxiu shrugged. "But if your wish is truly important to you..."
As he spoke, the corners of his mouth curved up slightly. "Someone once told me: even if I don't have a dream of my own, I can protect someone else's dream. Borrowing that sentiment: although I don't have any wish worth mentioning, I can help fulfill yours."
"But why?"
Lisi clutched Yaxiu's sleeve, shaking her head vigorously. "I don't understand... I'm not your family! I have no relation to you! We're just strangers... I don't like this... I don't want you to be so good to me... I don't want to..." As she spoke, her voice choked up more and more, turning incoherent as her eyes could no longer hold back the swelling tears that tumbled down like rain.
"Hey, didn't we agree that after the Weaving Ceremony ends, we'll be family?" Yaxiu smiled. "Still, your suspicion makes sense. How could any normal person give away such an opportunity? If Igola heard this, he'd definitely say I was using rhetoric to bewitch an ignorant little girl."
"That's not what I meant—"
"Do you remember when we first met?" Yaxiu said. "Back then in the underground hall, you were filthy all over, forced by Annan to sign a Contract. Then you looked around, threw your arms around me, and shouted a title that someone of my age couldn't bear..."
"Papa." Lisi couldn't help but laugh through her tears, then confessed a little guiltily, "Actually, back then, I just thought that out of everyone around, only you... seemed easy to trick..."
"Igola told me right away after the fact," Yaxiu said. "Yet I still trust my own judgment.
"When you hugged my leg, I could see fear in your eyes, see uneasiness, see trepidation, as though my leg was the only thread you could grasp while falling.
"You were just like how I used to be."
Lisi rubbed her eyes. "Like you?"
"Yeah. Back then, I was just like you: fear ruled my mind, uneasiness devoured my soul, and no matter where I fled, I couldn't escape loneliness," Yaxiu nodded. "And then, I was saved by someone."
"The person you want to see?"
"Yeah. So I really can't just leave you alone." Yaxiu turned toward the river, the shimmering light of the subterranean river reflected in his eyes. "I know the others don't really like you, but don't mind them. As long as I like you, this world will like you."
At this moment, how Lisi wished the surrounding streetlamps could be a bit brighter, the fluorescence of the subterranean river a bit more dazzling, so that she could clearly see the flickering light in Yaxiu's eyes—just how much of it was tenderness, and how much was affection.
"Wait," Lisi sniffled hard, struck by a terrible possibility. "Could it be that you're willing to go with Annan just to grant my wish—"
"No, no, no, you don't need to make me out to be so noble," Yaxiu said, between tears and laughter. "The main reason is that Annan would never let me go. Otherwise, I would definitely leave with you, Igola, and the rest. Since Annan insists on tormenting me like this, I can only roll with it and figure out how to take advantage of the benefits along with it.
"If you don't have any wish, I'll ask Annan to make a wish for me instead."
Wait, let Yaxiu make a wish?
Although he hadn't made up his mind yet, what if he had no other wish and ultimately wished to see 'that person' who was so important to him...?
Lisi immediately used Yaxiu's sleeve to roughly wipe her tear-streaked face, put on the mirror glove once more, and glanced down at the mirror.
Then she looked up and gazed earnestly at Yaxiu.
"Yaxiu, I am the Princess of Yisu."
Chapter 453