Sonia was a devoted fan of Daidalos, having watched all kinds of films and dramas starring her since childhood. When Sonia was twelve or thirteen, filled with an innocent, hazy longing for romance, Daidalos was in the prime of her youth at eighteen or nineteen, starring in numerous romance shows. It was through those very dramas that the little village girl's views on love gradually took shape and grew full.
Even though Daidalos was now a national superstar of Starry, even a diehard fan like Sonia had to admit that the romance dramas Daidalos starred in during her greener years were mostly flops.
In that era—and even now—the romance dramas that the people of Starry loved best were almost always tragic obsessions or tangled love polygons. All the characters were inextricably entangled, unable to part, living and dying for love as if love were greater than anything else. Sonia could understand it; after all, that kind of dramatic conflict made for captivating viewing.
Yet Daidalos hardly ever acted in such shows. Most of her roles were in career dramas featuring a single female lead, detective mysteries, or other films and shows where romance was not the main plotline. While romantic subplots existed, they served primarily as relaxing interludes amidst tense narratives, eliciting knowing smiles while awakening a quiet yearning in the viewer's heart.
In the occasional shows involving love triangles or polygons, Daidalos almost never played the female lead; she was almost always a supporting actress. Whether her character was good or evil, though she might fall for the male lead, she would never abandon her lifelong ideals for his sake. She would inevitably end up standing in opposition to him—a stark contrast to the other infatuated female characters—and consequently was usually the earliest supporting actress to exit the stage.
Later, when Sonia was fifteen or sixteen, Daidalos entered the peak of her career and starred in many "Empress" dramas—the kind where the female lead was the core of the entire story and all male characters were mere supporting players. Daidalos's calm, proud, unyielding, iron-blooded image in those shows deeply shook Sonia, who was still just an exam-grinding student at the time.
Influenced by Daidalos all throughout her upbringing, it was only natural that Sonia grew up holding romance in contempt and aspiring toward an ambitious career. Though meeting the Watcher had caused her suppressed romantic heart to stir restlessly, it did not mean she had turned foolish or altered her views on love; at most, she had regressed from twenty back to twelve or thirteen, an age of yearning for romance.
Upon realizing that the Watcher had another woman in reality, Sonia's immediate reaction had naturally been anger, resentment, sorrow, feeling wronged, and even murderous intent. She had wished she could unleash Blood Moon Shattered Lake on the spot... No, she should have used Blood Blossom Water Moon to slice the Watcher into thirty-six pieces.
But once she calmed down, the village girl realized she could do nothing.
Nothing at all.
Even though they met in the Void Realm every night, even though they had witnessed the Golden Fish, fought fiercely against the Heroic Spirit Legion, supported each other in the cabin of lost memories, and shared their futures in the Destiny Q&A... They could share every secret, every joy and sorrow, yet they simply could not touch each other's reality.
Even if Sonia lost her temper and truly killed the Watcher, it would only be slaying his soul projection. At most, it would force him to recuperate for a few months, completely devoid of real significance. Let alone interfering in his life, Sonia couldn't even threaten his existence.
Distance diminished the flutter of the heart until only an echo remained; space turned feelings into a moon reflected in water, floating above reality.
So even if the Watcher had someone he loved in reality, what could she do?
Act cute like a little kitten to compete for favor?
Throw tantrums, give him the cold shoulder, and press him corner by corner?
Tease and seduce him until he was head over heels?
Setting aside whether Sonia was even willing, the main point was: even if she did all that, could it stop the Watcher's actions in reality? Could it guarantee he wouldn't be half-hearted and fickle?
She couldn't.
Not to mention, Sonia wasn't willing to do so anyway.
After meeting the Watcher, she had never again stooped to fawn or flatter, nor had she ever put on those elaborate, dressed-up masks again. She had reclaimed her true self and become a better version of herself. She would never backslide.
More importantly, she was already a Two-Winged Sorcerer, a sword saint candidate. Advancing to Sanctuary in the future was practically a certainty, and she would sooner or later become a noble of Starry! With such strength and prospects, she was her own master wherever she went. Why should she pine away and live in fearful anxiety over a single man?!
Even if this strength had been bestowed by the Watcher, the same held true. Sonia was willing to help him manage the team well, doing her utmost in exploration and combat, but she would never surrender her entire body and soul to him!
Even though the Watcher had taken the initiative to apologize and explain just now, Sonia did not change her mind. In fact, analyzing from the composition of the Watcher's emotions, she faintly sensed that he might not have been the proactive party. The presence of guilt without true regret was proof of that.
But even if he wasn't proactive this time, what about next time? What about the time after that?
She couldn't solve the problem, nor could she deal with the person who caused it. Slaying any number of Fishcleaver Dragons couldn't give her the slightest sense of security.
Or rather, the Watcher had never done anything that could offer security: more and more operators, a reality that remained unconnected... The Watcher had never proactively declared his stance. Moreover, though he had been reborn with amnesia, he had ultimately been an expert in the past. Did his heart truly hold any soft spot capable of accommodating someone else?
Perhaps everything had merely been her one-sided wishful thinking, and now she was simply accepting the loss.
Sonia had already forgotten which drama it came from, but she still remembered Daidalos's line: "Any relationship that makes you suspicious and worried, anxious and uneasy, or even makes you doubt whether you aren't good enough, is a burden you must discard."
The village girl, always decisive and proactive, had previously refrained from advancing their emotional bond and kept it in an ambiguous haze precisely because she was aware of this lingering concern. Now that this concern had finally materialized, she could extricate herself cleanly and decisively—no lingering attachments, and no overwhelming sorrow to strike her down.
That was how it was supposed to be.
Yet as Sonia watched the Watcher talking and laughing with the Witch during battle, looking as if nothing had happened, she couldn't help a surge of sour jealousy laced with murderous intent rising in her heart—*He really never cared about me. That apology just now was nothing more than going through the motions. Without me standing in the way, he couldn't wait to cozy up to the Witch.*
Diya suddenly felt a spine-chilling wave of murderous intent coming from the side. Turning her head, she saw only the Sword Princess casually cutting down a Jagras. With a beaming smile, the Sword Princess walked over and asked, "What are you two chatting about?"
"The Watcher asked if I was tired tonight. If so, he suggested driving out to visit a distant special structure instead of continuing to scour resource points," Diya hurried to explain.
"I see." Sonia gave an "oh" and smilingly joined the conversation. However, her hands were not slow in the least; cunning and clever as the Jagras here were, they were still effortlessly wiped out by her.
Back in the car, Diya, sitting in the front row, looked back at the two conversing and laughing in the back seat and couldn't help breathing a sigh of relief. She thought to herself that the Watcher truly lived up to his name, resolving the Sword Princess's issue so quickly and even making up with her completely—
White Queen: "They haven't made up at all. Look at the Sword Princess's sword."
Diya looked over and noticed that the Sword Princess's sword wasn't strapped to her waist, but placed on the seat between her and the Watcher.
Black Butler: "Now look at the Watcher's posture."
Diya scrutinized closely and found that the Watcher was sitting sideways facing the Sword Princess, his left hand kept low to guard his body the entire time, as if bracing against a sneak attack from the flank.
Red Apostle: "Now try sticking out your tongue and panting, 'Hah-hoo, hah-hoo.'"
Diya did as told, instantly drawing bizarre looks from both the Watcher and the Sword Princess.
"Huh? Why are they looking at me?"
"You looked so much like a dog just now, of course they're looking at you," the Red Apostle remarked with a sigh. "Even I didn't expect you'd actually do it."
"You're the dog!"
Diya glanced at the Sword Princess and the Watcher, sighing inwardly.
*Sigh, relationships between adults are so complicated.*
*Fortunately, between us and Yaxiu, it's just pure mutual affection.*
.....
..
After half an hour's drive, they arrived outside a black, hemispherical space. It looked like a black bowl overturned upon the earth; even the reverse golden rain could not pierce that dense darkness.
"Dark Phantasmal Sound Miracle Paradise?" Sonia recognized it at a glance.
There were many varieties of Miracle Paradises on the Time Continent. For instance, the Mist Miracle Paradise they had visited before, where sorcerers had to catch sorcery spirits in the mist, and once the mist cleared, all the sorcery spirits would vanish.
The Dark Phantasmal Sound Miracle Paradise was another such challenging Miracle Paradise. Inside was an impenetrable darkness completely impervious to scouting, where even miracles would fail. Moreover, the voices of sorcery spirits were magnified countless times—though sorcerers could not understand them, their ears would be filled with nothing but cacophony.
Sorcerers had to capture sorcery spirits under conditions where both sight and hearing were severely impaired. It was also under a time limit: once time was up and the darkness dissipated, all the sorcery spirits would vanish as well.
"If the three of us split up, we're very likely to bump into each other inside," Yaxiu suggested. "How about the three of us hold hands? That way, we can form an encircling net to catch more sorcery spirits, while avoiding collisions."
It was a very reasonable proposal, and both the Witch and the Sword Princess readily agreed. Diya glanced at them and said, "Why don't I walk in the middle?"
Yaxiu shook his head. "Witch, you're skilled in the fist and claw faction, and Sword Princess specializes in the swordsmanship faction. You're both much more agile than me, so you should be on the flanks."
Holding hands, the trio walked up to the edge of darkness. Yaxiu suddenly remembered something and shot a burst of Love Sword into each of them. "It might not be very useful, but at least it can enhance your hearing and reflexes."
That feeling again.
Every time the Watcher strengthened her, Sonia felt as if she were being embraced by him. But unlike the embarrassed annoyance and joy of the past, this time she only felt the fondness in her heart receding and surging back amidst feelings of grievance, rising and falling in endless waves, until her eyes even grew red.
Fortunately, they had already stepped into the Dark Phantasmal Sound Miracle Paradise. No one would see the oddity in her expression, and no one would hear the tsunami within her heart.
Before her eyes was an impenetrable darkness; by her ears were the bustling, chaotic noises of sorcery spirits, both cheerful and noisy. The only physical entity she could feel was the hand holding hers. Just as a sense of reliance began to creep up, the village girl instantly extinguished such a cowardly thought.
The moment danger appeared, she wanted to rely on him; the moment he touched her, her heart fell into disarray. How was she supposed to walk away like this? Could anything be more indecisive and messy?
*I need closure,* the Paw-Stretching Club thought to herself.
Thinking carefully about it, they had never actually done anything between them—no hugs, no kisses, let alone anything else. At most, it was a lap pillow and holding hands. Thinking up to this point, Sonia stared into the darkness before her, listened to the noise by her ears, and couldn't help conceiving a bold idea—
As closure, or perhaps as a reward, she would secretly kiss him here. No one would notice, and if the Watcher asked, she could just say a sorcery spirit had bumped into his face.
This thought swiftly took root, sprouted, and grew into a towering tree. Sonia felt her heart beating faster and faster. Fortunately, souls had no body temperature; otherwise, she felt even her hands would be burning hot.
There was no better opportunity than this, whether it was to move forward or to bring an end.
Sonia took a deep breath, steeling her resolve. Silently turning her head, she gently leaned in—
*Chu.*
Sonia froze.
She knew the person before her had frozen as well.
In this moment, it was as if she truly saw through the so-called "Pitch-Black Mind's Eye"—saw the Watcher tightly pursing his lips, saw the resolve, the trepidation... and the pleasant surprise on his face.
Though there was no body temperature to speak of, heat seemed to burn from her lips all the way to the tips of her ears. Fortunately, there was the gentle darkness; no one could see her blushing face.
"I caught it!" the Witch's voice rang out nearby. "No wonder it was making such a loud noise. It's actually a 'Heartthrob' sorcery spirit!"
Chapter 470