Why Do I Have Nothing?

"Where is Yaxiu?" "You're traveling with Yaxiu, aren't you?" "Since you know who I am, we shouldn't be fighting!" In the wasteland town, two red-haired female swordswomen had battered down countless houses and walls in their duel, sword light cascading like a waterfall, blade hums pouring like rain. Matched evenly in swordsmanship and identical in appearance, Sonia felt the eerie illusion that she was looking into a mirror. In the flashes between flying strands of crimson hair, she glimpsed the resentment and ferocity spilling from those ruby eyes, and a faint feeling crept over her that this girl was another version of herself. Even that deep-seated malice buried in their hearts was so very alike. However— With a resounding clang, Sonia swung her sword heavily to force Niya back, speaking calmly: "If we get the chance, I'd be happy to fight you for as long as you want. But right now I have another mission, and I don't have time to waste! Has Yaxiu come here too? Does he know this is the Distant Sky Realm, overlapping with the Kingdom of Stars—" "He knows. Of course he knows." Niya's voice was very calm. Disheveled red hair fell over her face, concealing her expression. "He's even looking forward to you descending into my body again, just like last time, so he can have a secret tryst with you." Sonia froze, an awkward look flickering across her face. She didn't know how she was supposed to feel. Using someone else's body to be intimate with her lover, only to be caught by that person afterward—even television dramas had never featured a plot like this. She couldn't shake the guilt, feeling as though she had pushed someone into a pit of fire. "You know?" "Of course I didn't know why a man would be kissing me the moment I opened my eyes!" Niya laughed in bitter anger. "Much less why that man would look at me with the eyes of a lover!" "I'm sorry. I'm truly very sorry." Sonia didn't know what to say. "At that moment, I was overwhelmed by emotion. I didn't consider your feelings—" "Why would you care about my feelings? I'm just a vessel for your descent, a threat to your health, an identical substitute for you." Niya shook her head, her voice raspy. "Of course you don't care. When the lamp burns so bright, who cares where the shadow went?" Sonia started. "Yaxiu told you all that?" "I don't know how much else he's hiding from me, but I already understand where I stand." Niya pressed a hand to her chest. "The only reason he pays attention to me, protects me, and cares for me is because he loves you. He's terrified that you'll be hurt in the slightest, so by extension, he treasures me like a precious jewel too." "My greatest value in life is to keep you from being affected." She laughed helplessly. "I never imagined I would spend my life existing for someone else, let alone in such a... such a..." Sonia couldn't resist stepping closer, wanting to reach out and comfort her. "I really didn't—" Clang! Blades clashed. Niya threw her full weight into pressing her sword against the Sword Princess, tears shimmering in her blood-red eyes as she gritted her teeth: "Sword Princess, Yaxiu thinks I'm your curse, but to me, you're my greatest curse!" "Maybe without the original body, the shadow has no meaning to exist. But a shadow never wanted to be a shadow! No shadow wants to be trampled beneath someone else's feet forever!" "That's impossible!" Sonia strained against her force, pressing her back against a wall, and said earnestly, "Yaxiu might have looked after you out of selfish feelings for me, but he would never view you as a substitute, a shadow, or a curse!" "His flaws could take three days and three nights to list—he's impulsive, lazy, drifts along wherever life takes him, soft-hearted, oblivious to his own philandering, and can't even tell a lie... But he is definitely not some scumbag who disrespects other people!" "You can curse me, hate me, do whatever you like, but you are not allowed to slander my lover like that!" "Except that's exactly who he is!" Niya kicked her away, biting her lower lip lightly. "He never took me seriously!" "If that's true, then why are you so angry?" Sonia wasn't angry in the slightest, asking calmly: "If he really didn't care about you, why do you care about him so much?" "With a temper as bad as yours, if he insulted you like that, you should have killed him long ago. Why would you still be here with him?" "I never waste my care on people who don't deserve it." Sonia watched her quietly. "I believe you're the same." Niya's shoulders trembled. "I... I don't care..." "I still remember that when I descended through your body, he recognized me with a single glance." Sonia stepped forward cautiously. "I believe that when I left, he must have recognized you with a single glance as well." "When you showed up in that place last time, wasn't it because you wanted to save him too?" Niya gritted her teeth. "I already regret it! I want nothing more than to chop him to death with my own hands!" "I actually get that thought quite often myself," Sonia said with a shrug. "But the fact that you're still willing to travel with him now proves he must have touched your heart somewhere. I don't know why you're so intent on denying his respect for you, but since he's willing to act alongside you, it also proves you've earned his trust." "Slandering him like this not only insults his trust in you, it insults your own judgment." "Of course, neither of us has ever needed anyone else's validation." Sonia reached out and grasped Niya's shoulder. "Yet even without me, Yaxiu would surely still yearn for your help. You have the qualifications, and even more, the charm." "Because... you are me." Zheng. Sonia retreated hastily, but a sword slash still grazed her face. Clutching her cheek, she looked up at Niya, who had leaped backward onto the flat rooftop of a house. Niya sheathed her sword and said coldly, "You make me sick. I don't want to see you ever again. Don't follow me." Sonia was stunned for a moment, hardly believing her ears—could the dignified Sword Princess really be associated with a word like "disgusting"? Still, she could understand Niya's current state of mind: impulsive, quick-tempered, insecure. It was practically a carbon copy of her past self. People like that were especially loath to admit their own mistakes, and even less willing to acknowledge when others were right. Niya had just painted herself into a corner; forcing her to back down now would be worse than killing her. Yet Sonia couldn't possibly let go of Niya, her only lead. She chased after her, calling out: "Just how many of you came in? Is Yaxiu safe? What's your plan?" "Everyone is scattered right now—we should join forces!" "By the way, you haven't introduced yourself yet. What's your name?" Niya completely ignored her. Seeing that she was about to rush into the portal, Sonia took a deep breath and drew her sword, blocking her path. "Stop!" Clang! Niya drew her blade, pressing it against the Sword Princess. "Get lost." "You want to help Yaxiu too, don't you?!" Sonia urged sincerely. "We're on the same side, so why can't we—" "Who told you I want to help Yaxiu?" Niya stared straight at her, her voice growing increasingly agitated. "I want nothing more than for him to die in here with me!" "You're not like me! You're prettier than me, more elegant than me! You live in abundance, you have tons of friends, you have a lover longing to reunite with you—you're so happy, it's like you're living in a jar of honey...! You even trust your lover so deeply, you're sensible, considerate, gentle, and kind, willing to comfort someone as bad-tempered as me! And on top of that, you're a sorcerer with earth-shattering power, a reliable companion Yaxiu can lean on!" "Meanwhile, I have nothing!" Tears ran down Niya's face, her impassioned voice turning raspy as she bit her lower lip and murmured, "Why do I have nothing at all?" "Why should I help Yaxiu return to your side, help you two live happily ever after...? Why do you have to be so good? I hate you the most..." "I don't want to see you. I really don't want to see you... Please..." Sonia was momentarily dazed. In silence, she stepped aside to let Niya pass. But right as Niya was about to step into the portal, Sonia couldn't resist dashing forward, crossing through the portal at the exact same time. Yet the moment the Country Girl set foot on the other side, she knew things had gone terribly wrong. This battlefield was a vast, open grassland. More than forty sorcerers already filled her vision—and every single one wore the legion uniform of Fortress, Gryphon, or Starshot! This was a hunting ground for the Starry sorcerers!