They Weren't Wrong Either

On a bench in the central square, Weixi glanced at her phone. "It's almost time and they're still not here... But there's a smell of rain in the air; I wonder if the fireworks show will be canceled." Just then, Rose spoke up. "Niya, could you do me a favor?" Niya was slightly taken aback, then nodded. "Sure. What is it?" "Just sit still." Rose took Niya's arm, rested her head against Niya's shoulder, and closed her eyes to sleep. "Since Yaxiu isn't here, I'll take a little nap." "Are you tired?" "My sleep has decreased recently. Once night falls, I get drowsy." "Are you having insomnia too?" Weixi asked casually, but immediately realized something and turned to look at Rose. "I'm not the one with insomnia," Rose replied. *** Feili was crying so hard she could barely catch her breath, repeatedly wiping away her tears with her hands, but the more she wiped, the more they flowed. She knew she must look hideous right now. Her eye makeup was smudged, she couldn't stop hiccuping between sobs, and snot bubbles were even popping out—she was showing Yaxiu her absolute worst, most pathetic side. Yet she felt she deserved this. She was this ugly, this pathetic, a coward who could only cry. She couldn't even bring herself to say the words she had spent over a dozen days mulling over in her heart, and she still had to trouble Yaxiu to comfort her. She wasn't crying over Yaxiu; she was crying over her own powerlessness, her lack of courage, her inability to shoulder responsibility. She knew full well that Yaxiu had no obligation to sacrifice for this world. She wanted so badly for Yaxiu to find happiness, even if it wasn't with her, even if he found happiness in some place she would never know. She had wanted so much to defeat her romantic rivals, yet in the end, she couldn't even treat Yaxiu well. If only... if only... "If only I were Sword Princess." Feili drew a deep breath and looked at Yaxiu through tear-filled eyes. "If it were Sword Princess, she would definitely be able to say the words I can't say, and do the things I can't do..." "Why did you have to find a way to save the world... Why do you want to save the world..." She pounded lightly against Yaxiu's shoulder, large teardrops falling one after another. "Why don't I care about you as much as Sword Princess does..." "Shifting the blame onto my head is indeed very much Sword Princess's style," Yaxiu said with a wry smile. "You're making me wonder if it really is my fault. "Still, you're not wrong. If it were Sword Princess, she would definitely tie me up on the spot until the Angel Hunt ended." He shrugged. "The Witch would probably be a bit gentler—she'd likely handcuff me to her, going wherever I go... "But either way, they would stop me from risking the wrath of all the Divine Lords just to save a world that has nothing to do with me. It's not that they don't care about innocent lives, but they are far more decisive and ruthless than I am." "I'm sorry..." Feili wailed, scrubbing her eyes with her sleeve. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" "Why are you apologizing? I was complimenting you," Yaxiu said, caught between tears and laughter. "Besides, I was actually pretty scared that you'd tell me to call off the plan. After all, saving All Stars was your idea in the first place. If even you gave up, I'd actually be quite disappointed that you betrayed your original conviction." "But... but..." Feili pressed her lips together, looking like a heartbroken, dirty-faced kitten. "If I don't stop you, it's the same as tacitly consenting to you risking your life... I... I can't bring myself to encourage you, nor can I bring myself to stop you. All I can do is rely on you..." "That's why I'm happy." Resting his chin in his hand, Yaxiu smiled. "Because that is the Feili way. "I've always felt that you and I are the same kind of person, Feili. Turns out I was right." Feili sniffled her snot back in, looked blankly at Yaxiu, and then nodded heavily, accepting the accusation with deep grievance. "You're right. I'm just as scummy as you..." Yaxiu nearly coughed up blood and hurriedly explained, "That's not what I meant! And I'm not... scummy (whispered very softly)... What I mean is, the reason you're torn is because you're greedy, just like me." "Huh?" "Right now, it's like the trolley problem. The Divine Lord of Stars is the trolley, and on one track is the Nation of Stars while on the other is me. Either the Divine Lord of Stars crushes me, or the Divine Lord of Stars crushes All Stars," Yaxiu said. "You can't choose because you don't want to abandon either. You want to preserve both. "I'm the same way," he chuckled. "I'm certainly not aiming to sacrifice myself. I want to save All Stars, and I also want to come away in one piece." Feili sniffled and nodded. "That really is greedy." "We're just the kind of people who want this, want that, and want it all." Yaxiu raised a hand toward the canopy of stars. "In a world where miracles exist, why can't everyone find happiness?" Feili stared blankly at Yaxiu and asked timidly, "Is that really possible?" "Of course. I'm a sorcerer, after all, and sorcerers are a bunch of thieves chasing miracles." Yaxiu smiled. "Your mindset is very sorcerer-like, Feili. If you ever get the chance, you'd definitely make a successful sorcerer. When you make it big, don't go forgetting little Yaxiu." Feili laughed through her tears. "Occasionally, I dream about roaming through a starry sky. Can sorcerers do that?" "Probably... they can?" Yaxiu wasn't sure either. "Though I've never heard of any layer of the Void Realm being a starry sky... But even if there isn't one, you can steal a piece of the starry sky! Steal whatever you want—that is the sorcerer's creed!" "Stealing things..." Feili glanced at Yaxiu and murmured, "That does seem to suit me..." "But..." She lowered her head, biting her lip gently. "What if..." Yaxiu glanced at her. After thinking for a moment, he said, "I've started having insomnia again lately." "Again?" Yaxiu held up three fingers. "During my time in All Stars, I've had insomnia about three times. The first was when we just arrived. I felt I had dragged Igola and Harvey down with me, so I kept thinking about how to bring them back safely. Every night, I was looking up information in the study and couldn't sleep at all. "The second time was when I was infected with the hell secret poison. Even though I sounded so eloquent and composed talking to Igola, I was actually terrified myself. The moment I closed my eyes, I'd see the scene of Rajesh being smashed into Ruby Mountain by Hell. It took me a long time to get used to it." Feili listened intently. "Get used to the threat of the hell secret poison?" "No, get used to falling asleep while watching Rajesh get smashed into Ruby Mountain by Hell." Yaxiu spread his hands. "It got to the point where seeing any pool of red makes me want to yawn. "The third time having insomnia is recently." "Why?" "Because I get scared too, and anxious." Yaxiu smiled. "Igola often scolds me for having a death wish whenever I'm impulsive, but if I'm not impulsive, it's actually really hard for me to suppress my fear of death. I can face a sudden judgment of fate without fear, but stepping onto an unpredictable stage step by step like this slowly wears down my courage as well. "This past month has felt like being sliced with a dull knife. At first I wasn't afraid, but gradually the fear crept in, peaking over the last few days—I've even started wishing the Angel Hunt would just hurry up and begin, rather than spending every day trembling with apprehension. "I'm not that brave or selfless. I weigh pros and cons too, and I try to shift blame. Lying in bed, I can't help wondering: Why me? "If only someone else would suddenly appear to save All Stars; if only another way could be found; if only... I've even thought, if only Harvey and Igola had obtained the Soul Kingdom of Heaven instead, so long as the responsibility didn't fall on me. "I still have so many people I want to see and so many things I want to do. Why should I gamble my life for an unfamiliar world?" Yaxiu glanced at Feili. "All those 'what ifs' you're thinking about—I've thought through every single one during my sleepless nights. "I'm afraid of letting down Sword Princess, letting down the Witch, and letting down all the suffering I've endured." He murmured, "If I can't save All Stars and end up targeted by the Divine Lords, all that bitter effort ending in nothing—that would just be too pitiful. "Sometimes I even feel that rather than Igola's psychological counseling, what I need more is Harvey's hospice care." Hearing this, Feili felt somewhat downcast, but also somewhat relieved. She asked, "If that's the case, why do you still want to carry out the plan?" Yaxiu beamed. "I'm afraid of being unable to handle my relationships with Sword Princess and the Witch, yet I still can't wait to reunite with them," he said. "I'm afraid the plan will fail, yet I still want to save everyone's fate. "Being afraid is only natural—even Weixi clings to life and fears death, let alone me. But besides fear, more than anything I feel fortunate." Feili blinked her tearful eyes. "Hmm?" "Last time I encountered fate, I was caught completely off guard and suffered an utter defeat." Yaxiu reached out to wipe the tear streaks from Feili's face. "But this time, I can prepare in advance and arm myself to the teeth. I don't want to fail twice at the same thing. The dream can no longer be recovered, but I can keep the mirror from shattering. "I'm very glad that this time, I finally have a way to rewrite an ending I'm not satisfied with." At this moment, the cable car that had been stalled for so long finally began to move slowly. Outside, the whistling whooshes of fireworks sounded, though unfortunately, blocked by the mountains, they couldn't see the fireworks bursting at all. "So no matter how afraid I am, until the dust settles, I will give it everything I've got." Feili stared at him blankly. Yaxiu had spoken these words casually—neither resolute nor fiercely vehement. Yet precisely because of this, she could feel his determination. It was the spirit of a Lalafell climbing onto the chopping block to fight for its life even knowing it was bound for the slaughter, a courage far more transcendent than mere hot-blooded, fearless bravado. "...We won't make it back in time to see the fireworks," she whispered. "What a pity." "Yeah." Seeing that Feili was still downcast, Yaxiu chuckled. "Speaking of which, why did you shoulder the blame onto yourself? I was the one who made the decision, and Weixi was the one who made the suggestion. Even if someone has to take the blame, Weixi should be first in line." "Because..." Feili twiddled her fingers. "I felt it was my duty to stop you..." Yaxiu teased, "You didn't actually think the main reason I want to save All Stars is because of you, did you?" Flustered and ashamed, Feili blushed all the way to the tips of her ears and lowered her head, not daring to speak. She truly had thought so. But now that Yaxiu had called it out, she realized how childish she was—they had known each other for less than half a year, and Yaxiu was a top-tier powerhouse. Whatever he did was bound to be out of his own will; how could it possibly be for her sake? And did she really have that much influence over Yaxiu to sway his decisions? It wasn't like she was Sword Princess or the Witch! Selfishly seeking out Yaxiu to talk, only to do nothing but weep, getting comforted by him, and then having her conceited little thoughts exposed... It was only because they were still in the cable car; if they were on level ground, Feili would have wished she could find a hole in the dirt to crawl into. At this moment, Yaxiu showed no tact at all, continuing teasingly, "Igola and Weixi thought so too. After all, when it comes to saving All Stars, only you and I are really eager about it. They both think I'm this resolute because of you. Those two bastards made such a well-reasoned, logical case that I didn't even know how to refute them. After all..." The cable car suddenly surged upward, carrying them over the layered mountain crests, and the riotously bursting fireworks spectacle crashed into their field of vision in an instant. By now, the blazing white light of Xiaguang Happy World had been turned off, and the dazzling radiance of shimmering fireworks cascaded over everything, coating the cable car in resplendent color. "...they weren't wrong, either." Feili's tear ducts snapped shut in an instant as she stared foolishly at Yaxiu. But Yaxiu kept his eyes fixed ahead, admiring the fireworks as if he had never seen such a magnificent display in his entire life. Yet whether it was the red glow of the fireworks or a trick of the light, Feili saw a faint rosy blush blooming on his face, his eyelashes fluttering adorably. "We're in luck, seeing the fireworks from the best spot." Casually carrying on the conversation as if nothing had happened, Yaxiu said, "I remember they're supposed to have a fireworks wish-making segment here, right? Then I wish that our plan goes smoothly, the Divine Lords' schemes fail completely, All Stars stays safe, and I get away scot-free!" Looking at the dazzling fireworks blooming one after another against the night sky, Feili clasped her hands together and closed her eyes to make a wish. Yaxiu glanced at her without saying a word, but Feili took the initiative to ask, "Do you know what I wished for?" Yaxiu blinked. "Does it involve me?" "Yes." "...Is it easy to fulfill?" Feili thought about it and sniffled. "Not hard." Yaxiu grew a bit nervous. "What wish is it?" Feili pulled out a tissue to wipe her face, leaving Yaxiu hanging for quite a while before she smiled leisurely. "I want to see the sunlight, and walk down the street together with you." Yaxiu paused slightly, seeing Feili pressing her lips together as she looked at him, the blush on her face seeming even more vivid than the fireworks.